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NeatNit

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NeatNit
  • Town/Country : Israel
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 8372
  • Number of comments : 732
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

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NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a horribly realistic dream where I was being robbed and had to swallow my wedding ring to save it. After waking up, I realized my wedding ring is in fact gone. The doctor assures me that I will have it back in a day or two. FML

#2896238
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47068) - you deserved it (3309)

On 06/14/2009 at 9:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - Japan (Okinawa)

Today, my motorcycle was stolen from the 4th level of my “secure” gated parking garage. I strategically park it tightly between my car and a concrete wall to limit theft opportunity. They scratched my car trying to get it out. FML

#2885254
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38442) - you deserved it (2593)

On 06/14/2009 at 1:28pm - misc - by stolenbike (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to play the role of superman in a production on stage. They had to stuff my underwear because my 'thing' wasn't big enough. FML

#2769644
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65013) - you deserved it (5036)

On 06/10/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by superman_not (man) - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)

Today, we got my brother a pet hamster because he has trouble making friends. We thought a hamster would be a good way to teach him about caring for others. I walked into the room and the hamster was hanging from the ceiling. Turns out there's a reason my brother doesn't have friends. FML

#2651635
475 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66938) - you deserved it (4526)

On 06/06/2009 at 1:51am - animals - by hamsterlovinn (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was partnered with this really sexy guy for an audition. He says, "Am I really stuck with you? I can't even stand being seen with you in public!" I start cursing him out really loud, but then I realize that he's only reading the script. Everyone was staring, and he called me a crazy bitch. FML

#2445222
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10084) - you deserved it (60326)

On 05/30/2009 at 9:13pm - misc - by jazzyfizzle (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML

#2321503
855 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28394) - you deserved it (238611)

On 05/26/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by Jerrrr (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

#2282414
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16838) - you deserved it (31428)

On 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by wordmalfunction (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went bowling. The guy at the lane next to us was bowling by himself and had a few of his own bowling balls, and he had one that looked like a yin-yang and it looked very cool spinning down the lane into the pins. Not really thinking, I casually said to him "Hey, I like your balls." FML

#2039933
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13305) - you deserved it (48705)

On 05/18/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by nothing (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my friend Kate and I were helping build a playground. Halfway through, a construction worker asks where we go to school. I told him we graduated and proudly held degrees in psych. The construction worker stopped mid-dig, glanced at us sadly and said, "yeah that's what my degree's in too." FML

#2001814
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43236) - you deserved it (7277)

On 05/17/2009 at 12:20am - work - by blairheir721 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML

Today, my boyfriend took me to his grandfather's funeral. At the reception, his family members insist on hearing me play piano. After getting positive reactions, I dive into one of my favorites, Rustle of Spring. In 2 seconds everyone bursts into tears. That was Papa's favorite too. FML

#1768165
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46699) - you deserved it (3036)

On 05/09/2009 at 12:54am - misc - by pianokiller (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML

#1628197
355 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24257) - you deserved it (65692)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went into work to set up a new store. There was a lot of lifting so I dressed casual. This happened to be the day the owner brought in his conservative family to check out the store. I was wearing a shirt that says "everyone poops" and has a donkey and elephant pooping. FML

#1616689
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13039) - you deserved it (53237)

On 05/04/2009 at 1:40am - work - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball... right into her face again. FML

#1452410
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59803) - you deserved it (27541)

On 04/29/2009 at 10:35am - misc - by hyper12332 (man) - Australia (Victoria)



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