Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 24534
  • Number of comments : 994
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>smeegle</b> - 13 hours ago<b>xChaos</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 2:10am<b>klutz44</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 8:58pm<b>DeadxTime</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 10:22am<b>idefka</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:54am<b>Hey_Its_Batman</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 6:07pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 5:54am<b>little_one</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 12:45pm<b>KhaleesiDannie</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 2:40pm<b>zippocobalt6</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 7:00am<b>ceciliebossow</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 2:13am<b>epicx22</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 3:30pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 9:48am<b>chloe_renae55</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 3:40pm<b>oshhatesu</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 11:13am<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 6:01pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 12:26pm<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 10:59am

Fucked!<b>xChaos</b> - yesterday at 8:11am<b>zippocobalt6</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 1:01pm<b>epicx22</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 9:31pm<b>chloe_renae55</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 9:40pm<b>IncognitoPoison</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 5:42pm<b>LilRedRobinHood</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 1:58am<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 10:46pm<b>DeltaDragonxx</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 3:21am<b>beautifulmymy</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 8:32am<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 12:23am<b>TMWhisp</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 3:05am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 12:40am<b>AHzulu</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 7:52am<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 3:36am<b>CitricAcid</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 1:08am<b>taterrtots</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:02pm<b>I_Like_Dogs</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 10:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 5:31pm

NeatNit's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of NeatNit's badges

NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss fired me because he said I was spending too much time surfing the internet. When I reminded him that my work computer isn't even networked, he said, "Oh, sorry, you're the one who takes too many smoke breaks." When I told him that I don't even smoke, he said, "Just go..." FML

Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30722) - you deserved it (5304)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:01am - animals - by misTreated (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went into a music store to look into getting a new guitar. I picked up one that I was interested in and tried it out quietly. A sales representative approached me and asked me to "stop the noise and leave the guitars for serious customers." I've been playing for almost ten years. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35507) - you deserved it (5770)

On 05/26/2010 at 2:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23813) - you deserved it (11784)

On 05/21/2010 at 8:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mom bought me some expensive Japanese candy. I opened it, and saw that each chewy candy was wrapped in a thin, hard to peel off wrapper. After trying to get each wrapper off, I determined they were unopen-able and threw them away. I then read the box, saying the wrappers were edible. FML


I agree, your life sucks (7641) - you deserved it (53836)

On 05/20/2010 at 8:37am - misc - by Candy - United States (Maryland)

Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42150) - you deserved it (3492)

On 05/08/2010 at 6:07am - intimacy - by notmydad. (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I decided to fake it when my husband and I were making love. Afterwards, he told me that he could tell my head was "really in the game" and felt a stronger connection with me now and was glad I opened up and "let go" with him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (10208) - you deserved it (38187)

On 03/17/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by shouldabeenapornstar (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking with my girlfriend of a year and a half on the beach. Everything was fine until she saw a plane with a banner behind it saying "Cassie, will you marry me?" She said yes. I didn't order a plane. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49064) - you deserved it (4350)

On 03/16/2010 at 12:50am - love - by ManInTrouble - United States (California)

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML


I agree, your life sucks (10331) - you deserved it (38791)

On 03/15/2010 at 10:27pm - misc - by hiii. (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I realized that I can still do the splits. Why? Because I fell down an entire flight of stairs, everyone in the hall saw me land and applauded. Someone even shouted "and she sticks the landing." FML


I agree, your life sucks (25418) - you deserved it (3474)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by misty_love (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to yell out "Pass us the bong, Emma!" while I was on the phone to my mother. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26115) - you deserved it (6056)

On 02/26/2010 at 3:30am - misc - by UnfortunateGirly (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went in to my local cafe for my morning coffee. I was chatting to the barista as she was making it, and I mentioned that I was starting a new diet. She goes, "Oh that's great! I've been sneaking skimmed milk in your coffee for years, I didn't want to say anything..." FML


I agree, your life sucks (26813) - you deserved it (5579)

On 02/17/2010 at 9:47pm - health - by Skimilk (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out the guy I've been dating is heavily into a mystical card game and spends all of his money going to "Magic" card conventions across the country. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12939) - you deserved it (26764)

On 02/12/2010 at 12:03am - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13814) - you deserved it (26315)

On 02/09/2010 at 2:10pm - misc - by kingmetal42 - Sent from mobile version

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: