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NeatNit

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NeatNit

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13134
  • Number of comments : 821
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>derp_taco</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Ltsdragons</b> - 15 hours ago<b>boomergrl</b> - 21 hours ago<b>LexiDaBae</b> - yesterday at 7:22am<b>mip_92</b> - yesterday at 2:24am<b>LAUREN_1053</b> - yesterday at 5:52pm<b>BigMeepers</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 7:00am<b>random_cashmere</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 6:26pm<b>123ika</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 4:18pm<b>Jreslier</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 11:59am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 11:54am<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:11am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 1:00am<b>BreadstickFTW</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:51pm<b>nataliewby</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 2:26pm<b>chandlerjohnvy</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 7:34am<b>drugsRfun</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 1:19am<b>polarbearpiss</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 7:43am

NeatNit's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

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You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of NeatNit's badges

NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML

Today, I wanted to show my teenage daughter what we did when I was her age. We used to breakdance, so I stuck on a Grandmaster Flash track, and tried some old moves on the living room floor. I spun out of control, smacked my head into a wall and pulled a back muscle. FML

#17516862
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10886) - you deserved it (36750)

On 08/19/2011 at 3:13am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got woken up by a text from an unknown number at 3 am saying, "haha I found your number." I ignored it and tried to go back to sleep. After hours of trying to fall asleep, my drowsiness was disturbed by another text from the same person saying, "Sorry, wrong number." FML

#17516576
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24293) - you deserved it (3722)

On 08/19/2011 at 2:38am - misc - by Reena (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up to my roommate sniffing my underwear. He said he was checking if they were clean, so he could borrow them later. Which may have been reasonable, if I weren't still sleeping in them. FML

#17516529
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41404) - you deserved it (2868)

On 08/19/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by leftwardfoil (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after a tennis lesson, the coach was picking up the stray tennis balls around the court. Trying to be helpful, I asked him, "Do you want me to grab your ball bag?" His eyeballs almost burst out of their sockets. FML

#17512926
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26502) - you deserved it (7521)

On 08/18/2011 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by BigmouthStrikesAgain (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, a man with a face like a corpse's shoe started talking to me in the long queue at the Post Office. Apparently, his mother invented the banana, and he's first in line for the throne in France if ever Prince Harry dies. And his breath smelled like Satan's ass gas. FML

#17496000
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27739) - you deserved it (3340)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up exhausted because a croaking frog had kept me awake the night before. This has happened every night for the past week, and no matter how far away I take the frog, it always ends up sitting in the same place the next morning. FML

#17490517
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24775) - you deserved it (5154)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by froggylicious - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML

#17490024
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20763) - you deserved it (9898)

On 08/16/2011 at 12:55pm - work - by secret dancer (woman) - Sweden (Jonkopings Lan)

Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML

#17487298
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30803) - you deserved it (12527)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by Anon - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36882) - you deserved it (3460)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, I was at the airport to pick up my mother since my baby is due soon. As she arrived, I smiled wide and opened my arms for a hug, but she walked right by me. Apparently, being pregnant makes me unrecognizable. My husband and I had to tell it her was me, her own daughter. FML

#17468026
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28836) - you deserved it (2613)

On 08/14/2011 at 6:34am - misc - by Motherly Love - United States (Virginia)

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML

#17460856
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28422) - you deserved it (5711)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I decided to prank my boyfriend by putting a pair of panties in his coat pocket. I stormed in and confronted him with the "evidence". I guess the prank worked; he broke down and confessed to cheating on me. FML

#17452928
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30973) - you deserved it (39739) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/12/2011 at 7:15pm - love - by Anonymous - France

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

#17447833
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43281) - you deserved it (6401)

On 08/12/2011 at 3:44am - animals - by squishylog - United States (California)



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