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Today, my mom gave me a talk on safe sex. During a three hour car ride. With my friends in the back seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37836) - you totally deserved it (2072)
On 07/18/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I had my first kiss at a party. Later, I was told that the guy had been dared to kiss the ugliest girl in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51517) - you totally deserved it (3584)
On 07/13/2009 at 11:00am - misc - by FirstKiss (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28674) - you totally deserved it (16235)
On 07/11/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by jadakorn (man) - United States (New York)
Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32407) - you totally deserved it (3678)
On 07/11/2009 at 5:10am - work - by grannysmack (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, one of my bosses came into work and told me that they had seen my dad's twin in the supermarket holding hands and kissing a much younger woman and her baby. My dad doesn't have a twin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37364) - you totally deserved it (1026)
On 07/09/2009 at 10:37pm - misc - by tor (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to become a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45623) - you totally deserved it (1812)
On 07/05/2009 at 12:46pm - love - by fd_uplife (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was walking around town with the girl I have loved for four years and have been 100% faithfull to. A random girl thought it would be funny to approach me and pretend she was the girl I was seeing, and that I was cheating on her. My girlfriend believed her and broke up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52684) - you totally deserved it (2033)
On 07/05/2009 at 1:59am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20641) - you totally deserved it (57219)
On 07/03/2009 at 10:16am - misc - by shandrith (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went to the doctor. I told her I felt down all the time. She asked me a few questions and she told me I was depressed. She suggested to go home and find the sources of my depression. When I told my parents, they started laughing and said "Yeah, right." I think I found my source. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36172) - you totally deserved it (1794)
On 07/02/2009 at 3:49pm - health - by farrahfarrest_ (woman) - United States (California)
Today, at the restaurant I work at, I gave a man back his change and told him to enjoy the sunny day. He replied by dramatically saying that the sun was his mortal enemy. Thinking he was joking, I asked him if he was a vampire. Turns out he has skin cancer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30645) - you totally deserved it (9231)
On 07/02/2009 at 4:31am - misc - by Kristache (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33387) - you totally deserved it (6685)
On 07/02/2009 at 3:22am - misc - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend was on the roof of his house. I climbed the ladder but I am kind of scared of heights so when I got up there I just sat on the edge. The gutter broke and fell down and I fell along with it. My boyfriend said, "I've been trying to tell you to go on a diet". FML
I agree, your life sucks (28113) - you totally deserved it (4804)
On 07/01/2009 at 11:36pm - misc - by sydsophnova (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my little cousin came to visit my family. I haven't seen him in a while so I figured he missed me. Thinking so, I tried to hug him. While going in for the hug, he punched me in the happy sacks and called me a faggot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30036) - you totally deserved it (2444)
On 07/01/2009 at 9:46pm - misc - by lifesuckks8 (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out, and about to have sex, when she asked me to "do that thing we did yesterday". We haven't had sex in 6 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35993) - you totally deserved it (2390)
On 07/01/2009 at 1:18am - intimacy - by conductingfromthegrave (man) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut for cheating on him since we never had sex. I attempted to explain the birth control was for a condition I have that causes my period to be non-existent. He didn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49019) - you totally deserved it (4063)
On 06/30/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
