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Mobility
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Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35491) - you deserved it (7642)
On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend emailed me this morning to let me know that he had forwarded the joke that I had sent to him to all of his workmates and friends. He was quickly given the heads-up by one of his friends that all of our intimate emails from the day were also included. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19420) - you deserved it (6353)
On 11/18/2010 at 11:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was in lying in bed with my boyfriend while he was asleep. He is going to school to be a doctor, and it appears that he says anatomical terms while asleep. My boyfriend can make me feel stupid in his sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10122) - you deserved it (18723)
On 10/24/2010 at 7:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I spent a hundred dollars on new "business casual" clothes and took two hours to get ready for my interview with a government agency. My interviewer was blind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19697) - you deserved it (4990)
On 10/07/2010 at 9:55am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was sitting in my room watching TV when I heard my mother obnoxiously yelling for the dog. Minutes later she stomped into my room, swatted me over the head, and yelled at me for not answering when she called. She actually got my name mixed up with the dog's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26382) - you deserved it (1875)
On 10/07/2010 at 12:21am - animals - by lindsey789 (woman) - United States (Alaska)
Today, my friends took me to a strip club for my 25th birthday. I went onstage with 5 dollars in my mouth to tip the dancer. She then took off my belt and pants and spanked me 25 times with the buckle end of the belt. I paid a stripper 5 dollars to whoop my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6518) - you deserved it (27878)
On 10/06/2010 at 7:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom was going through the newspaper and cutting out coupons for me to use. She hands me two of them, one for tampons and the other for a pregnancy test saying "well, you're gonna need one or the other this month." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18615) - you deserved it (6188)
On 09/17/2010 at 4:19am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, we were in the car with my puppy, who favours my sister. She had been sat on her lap for a while, when she stood up and climbed onto my lap. I was really pleased until she peed on me and then went straight back to my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24011) - you deserved it (2186)
On 09/17/2010 at 2:30am - misc - by PuppyPeeTimee. - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, my girlfriend's dad offered me $100 to break up with his daughter. I eagerly replied "no", but my girlfriend grabbed the money and said, "deal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28583) - you deserved it (2425)
On 09/16/2010 at 9:30pm - love - by ccblock (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend of three years decided it was finally time to have sex. After we did, he told me that he was sleeping with another girl. He wanted to have sex with me to see who was better. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35778) - you deserved it (4431)
On 09/16/2010 at 8:35pm - intimacy - by Laura - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I crawled into bed naked, wanting to get some and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass and said 'oh' then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25661) - you deserved it (4121)
On 09/16/2010 at 1:13am - intimacy - by bonesniffer (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boss reached over and yanked up my shirt right above my breasts while she said, "I'm all for flaunting it if you've got it, but don't reveal that much cleavage, there are dirty old men that work here." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11814) - you deserved it (26588)
On 09/15/2010 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I took my girlfriend of 3 years out to where we had our first date. I proposed to her. She breaks down in tears as she tells me she's been sleeping with her co-worker for the past year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44177) - you deserved it (2358)
On 09/14/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by ohno - United States
Today, a grasshopper jumped into my car. As my boyfriend swiped at it, the grasshopper jumped onto my chest and into my shirt. Instead of helping me get it out, my boyfriend leaned back and said, "It got to second base faster than I did." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20782) - you deserved it (7501)
On 09/14/2010 at 3:27am - love - by tickyette (woman) - United States
Today, my husband won't talk to me because he got mad when I asked him what he thought about 'that lame performance last night'. He doesn't believe that I really was talking about football. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21869) - you deserved it (7065)
On 09/13/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by GonnaBeLonley2night - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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