Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 255
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About NH_Freelancer : Animal lover. Environmentalist. Photographer. Feel free to message me if you want. I don't bite, I just nibble a little!

NH_Freelancer's page activity

Visits<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:26am<b>SadSouthernBell</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 6:46am<b>rylaii</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:26am<b>kaz55</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 9:36pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 7:28pm<b>rachelllllb</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:16pm<b>EclipseCandy6</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:46am<b>ninjamadi</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 11:23pm<b>michelle202123</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 12:11am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 8:39pm<b>anorexic189</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 5:16pm<b>luvsumer</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 1:46pm<b>supersavvy</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:07pm<b>amileah13</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:46am<b>RAH94</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:22am<b>burninsnow</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 11:39pm<b>tamesenicole</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 12:14pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 2:49am

Fucked!<b>luvsumer</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 7:46pm<b>EclipseCandy6</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 6:18pm<b>Skulllily</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 9:59pm<b>BlondePsycho</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 8:07pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 11:43pm

NH_Freelancer's FML badges


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of NH_Freelancer's badges

NH_Freelancer's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I caught our 12-year-old son "experimenting" with a 5-foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse. He even made sure to rip Mickey's pants off. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26319) - you deserved it (2865)

On 04/13/2015 at 1:35am - intimacy - by bigmouthedmommy - United States (California)

Today, my mother in law accidentally cc'd me on an email she was sending to my husband, telling him that his youth is fleeting and that he should leave me while he still has time. FML


I agree, your life sucks (91) - you deserved it (1864)

On 03/12/2015 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was doing laundry, so I decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25721) - you deserved it (4954)

On 02/26/2015 at 7:08pm - animals - by jynxisadouchebag - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend managed to orgasm by humping my leg. I'm beginning to think I am dating a puppy. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31308) - you deserved it (3777)

On 02/25/2015 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by failuretolaunch2 - United States

Today, my grandma rushed into my work and told my manager I had to leave due to a family emergency. Panicked, I ran to get my stuff and ran to the car. When I asked what had happened, she replied, "I needed someone to go see 50 Shades of Grey with me." FML


I agree, your life sucks (33368) - you deserved it (3384)

On 02/13/2015 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my caring way too much about proper grammar got out of hand when I corrected my girlfriend during a talk about her dying grandmother. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15794) - you deserved it (33939)

On 02/10/2015 at 11:58pm - misc - by randomdude3890 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34430) - you deserved it (2332)

On 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my friends and I were talking about our celebrity lookalikes. We decided that my friends all had attractive celebrity lookalikes, including Scarlett Johansson and Hayden Panettiere. When it was my turn, they decided that my "celebrity" lookalike is the Pillsbury Doughboy. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26036) - you deserved it (3281)

On 01/04/2015 at 4:53pm - misc - by KD (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my brother and I woke up early to get a sneak peek at our Christmas presents. We found our parents having sex on the couch. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34440) - you deserved it (13424)

On 12/25/2014 at 4:13am - intimacy - by VCDUDE11FTW - United States (Ohio)

Today, my coworkers and I were comparing the backgrounds we have on our phones. They pretty much sum up our love lives; everyone else's background is a photo of their boyfriend or girlfriend. Mine's a photo of a lifeless desert. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36365) - you deserved it (4462) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/11/2014 at 3:05pm - love - by Fennec (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: