Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MzZombicidal

Online | Search for a member

MzZombicidal

0Liked!

MzZombicidalMzZombicidal
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 October 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5788
  • Number of comments : 451
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 22 posted

About MzZombicidal : VvV Please read before messaging me VvV
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hello! Feel free to take a look around! I'm Kristine (pronouced Kris-teen), 21, in a serious relationship, Atheist, extremely obsessed with sloths, zombies, body modification and currently addicted to Call of Duty: Ghosts and Gotham City Impostors. I don't use any social networking sites/apps so please don't ask me for them. FML.com, Twitch (SlothFiendKristine), and Xbox 360 (Mz Zombicidal) is as social as I get and that's not changing. Compliments are fine but /please/ don't flirt with me. [Respect me and I'll respect you.] I'm pretty sick of people so please don't message me just to ignore everything you've read here. Have a great day! ♥ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Go ahead and message me! I LOVE talking! :D

MzZombicidal's page activity

Visits<b>hellryu</b> - 11 hours ago<b>moondoggie</b> - 12 hours ago<b>trex454</b> - yesterday at 4:04pm<b>krakalacka</b> - yesterday at 2:25pm<b>Chelsea_bella</b> - yesterday at 1:47pm<b>aswethinkweiz</b> - yesterday at 1:38pm<b>mangelon86</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 11:21am<b>Attacksloth</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 8:54pm<b>hopsinlove17</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 10:50pm<b>myagi</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 8:59am<b>MarcoLoco</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 1:08am<b>depressed_child</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:27pm<b>tiwan</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:15pm<b>massie91</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 2:17pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:29pm<b>sajupt</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 12:02pm<b>jeremy1993</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:38am<b>ManualBeatle56</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:15am

MzZombicidal's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of MzZombicidal's badges

MzZombicidal's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31660) - you deserved it (3260)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I learned that even though a woman has a baby carriage and seems friendly, she won't be afraid to mug you in front of her kid. FML

#21262985
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33805) - you deserved it (2854)

On 09/22/2014 at 6:58am - health - by deathstar3548 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML

#21261512
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35093) - you deserved it (3345)

On 09/19/2014 at 10:27pm - misc - by failingdaily - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, I told my physiotherapist a funny story. She got so entertained that she started giggling and twisted my broken arm. The pain was worse than when it broke in the first place. FML

#21251280
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31827) - you deserved it (3120)

On 09/03/2014 at 5:30pm - health - by svenska75 (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, a schoolmate I've always secretly hated came over to my place to hang out. She found her way to my room and instantly noticed my dartboard, which I'd taped a picture of her face onto. FML

#21246638
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20047) - you deserved it (41392)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:57pm - misc - by Woops (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

#21245090
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36537) - you deserved it (13723)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm - kids - by JackieD (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML

#21243667
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32660) - you deserved it (22742)

On 08/23/2014 at 8:28am - work - by in big trouble - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend sent me pictures of him and his family on their trip in Florida. He accidentally included a picture of a girl sleeping in his bed, naked. FML

#21242918
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49145) - you deserved it (3254)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:02am - love - by lolatmylife - United States

Today, a customer told my boss I was too pushy because I asked her what bra size she wears. I work at a lingerie store. I got a stern lecture from my boss. FML

#21240726
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38892) - you deserved it (2911)

On 08/18/2014 at 10:59pm - work - by sorrynotsorry (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was mowing the lawn while wearing gym shorts. Because I had no pockets, I tucked my phone into the waistband of my shorts. I didn't notice my phone had slipped until the lawnmower started making an awful sound. FML

#21233543
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33165) - you deserved it (19535)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by ThatsNotGrass (man) - Canada

Today, I proposed to the love of my life by having the waitress place the ring in her dessert. She ate the whole thing and didn't find the ring. I guess the waitress stole the ring. FML

#21233475
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42963) - you deserved it (5588)

On 08/09/2014 at 7:03pm - love - by jakethemuss - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while I was proposing. FML

#21223358
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52296) - you deserved it (7179)

On 07/28/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by rejected - United States (California)

Today, my husband decided to play a recording of me breaking wind in my sleep to my whole family at the dinner table. To make matters worse, it was a compilation of different noises from over a long period of time. My family was horrified and my husband seemed proud of himself. FML

#21222673
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38071) - you deserved it (3851)

On 07/28/2014 at 12:36am - misc - by blow away - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

#21216984
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36361) - you deserved it (23705)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:55am - intimacy - by teegtwo (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: