MysticAmmu

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MysticAmmu

13Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Aalesund, Norway
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 July 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 18664
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.

If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.

I'm also from Thailand and Norway.

MysticAmmu's page activity

Visits<b>frankmz</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 9:23pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 8:45am<b>c0ffeeb3an</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 2:06am<b>jessroses</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 9:22am<b>jonomc</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 11:36am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 2:51pm<b>Blee864</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 10:36am<b>_minifty</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 10:50pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 6:45pm<b>Adamjohn82</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 2:28am<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:45pm<b>jansdrs</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 11:07pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 6:13pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 4:41am<b>dom_g</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 1:50am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 1:14am<b>JustMe1600</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 12:35am<b>moron011</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 12:38am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 2:44pm<b>_minifty</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 4:50am<b>jansdrs</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 5:07am<b>Blee864</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 5:31pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 8:41pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:27am<b>tralulilulalala</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 9:12pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 10:04pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 12:07am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 1:19pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 11:32pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:59am

MysticAmmu's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of MysticAmmu's badges

MysticAmmu's favorite FMLs

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, during a series of violent sneezes due to a cold, I bit my tongue. My tongue is now so swollen I cannot close my mouth and am drooling profusely. I have to get ready to go to my job as a cashier. FML

by samaram / 06/04/2013 at 2:47am / United States / Health

Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2013 at 4:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

by Samprib / 06/01/2013 at 1:09am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, thanks to an idiotic, "hilariously edgy" advert that screened in the very early evening, my 6-year-old son keeps repeating the phrase "I want a vasectomy" to everyone he sees. I've never received so many dirty looks in my life. FML

by theybitchaboutgnomesbutnotthis?? / 05/31/2013 at 6:25pm / United Kingdom (Devon) / Kids

Today, I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with my girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 3:17am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

by more than I wanted to know / 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm / Italy (Emilia-Romagna) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML

by the girl next door / 05/07/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm / Ireland (Donegal) / Love

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

by ADickySituation / 05/05/2013 at 12:14am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I learned that binding my stomach with duct tape isn't worth it to look thin. I also learned the even worse part when I shrieked more loudly than I should've when I tried to discreetly rip it off in history class. FML

by QueenOrangeSoda / 05/01/2013 at 5:33pm / United States (Nevada) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 11:55am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after a few weeks of my friends pestering me to spend time with a mutual friend, I realized we had a lot in common. We both love shoes, peanut butter, and it appears that my boyfriend of three years is her boyfriend of four years. FML

by Stupid / 04/22/2013 at 2:58am / United States (Idaho) / Love

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

by reyoflight / 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm / Brazil (Rio de Janeiro) / Kids