Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MysticAmmu

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

MysticAmmu

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Aalesund, Norway
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 July 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16128
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.

If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.

I'm also from Thailand and Norway.

MysticAmmu's page activity

Visits<b>moron011</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 12:38am<b>killjoyx</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:37pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:31pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 2:40pm<b>resilientsoul</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 9:10am<b>Lorenzo1102</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 1:31am<b>Aziraya</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 6:33pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:30pm<b>JoshWade62</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 6:22pm<b>tralulilulalala</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 3:12pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 8:22am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:07pm<b>thunderfucked</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 2:45am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:06am<b>Caps_hockey</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 6:55am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 12:59am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 7:23pm<b>brkopplin</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:40pm

Fucked!<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 8:41pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:27am<b>tralulilulalala</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 9:12pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 10:04pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 12:07am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 1:19pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 11:32pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:59am

MysticAmmu's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of MysticAmmu's badges

MysticAmmu's favorite FMLs

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54791) - you deserved it (19857)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was told that I'm very likely to win the "Most Likely to Exceed 5 Cats" yearbook award. My best friend said, "They wanted it to be 'Most Likely to Die Alone', but it was a bit harsh". Someone else added, "It's still pretty likely, though". FML

#21128889
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41234) - you deserved it (4001)

On 05/02/2014 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my coworkers decided to throw me a surprise baby shower. I'm not pregnant. FML

#21126521
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43000) - you deserved it (5190)

On 04/29/2014 at 6:58pm - work - by fat girl - United States (Alaska)

Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean my room. When I went to pick up the first thing off my floor I hit my head on my desk and gave myself a concussion. FML

#21123165
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35329) - you deserved it (6376)

On 04/26/2014 at 12:22am - misc - by vee2013 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was out drinking with some colleagues, when one started ranting about some pretty sensitive subjects. There were some Latino guys nearby, and as soon as he said "I'm not racist, but..." I tried to casually get the hell out of there. We all got the crap beaten out of us anyway. FML

#21122958
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40113) - you deserved it (6374)

On 04/25/2014 at 7:45pm - health - by fuck you, Jeff (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from a girl I've had a crush on for a while. As I was about to accept it, it vanished. She explained later that she clicked on my name by accident, and didn't actually want to be friends at all. FML

#21121713
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46820) - you deserved it (3760)

On 04/24/2014 at 11:30am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, after years of marriage and my lazy husband letting himself go, I can now finish a bottle of wine and still be sober. This means I've built immunity to the last thing that can make me want to have sex with him. FML

#21119490
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53296) - you deserved it (14366)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my drug addict of a roommate convinced herself my red kitten was Pennywise the clown in disguise waiting to kill her, and hit him over the head with a pan. FML

Today, my boyfriend drove 20 miles to come see me. The closest we got to intimacy was him showing me how he could unlock his iPhone 5s with his penis. FML

#21118643
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48962) - you deserved it (7100)

On 04/21/2014 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Iowa)

Today, my crazily elitist parents were so desperate to get me to dump my fiancé that they threatened to divorce if I didn't. When I told them to go ahead, they bitched me out for being disrespectful. FML

#21117173
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46457) - you deserved it (3972)

On 04/19/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by reb (woman) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55482) - you deserved it (5724)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65670) - you deserved it (32879)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, due to my wife saying I never cook and we always order pizza, I spent a good hour preparing dinner. While serving it to my kids, they started complaining. My wife told them to shut up. When she took a bite, she looked up at me, smiled, and said, "Do you, you know, want to just order pizza?" FML

#21108567
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40963) - you deserved it (5626)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by Max - United States

Today, my in-laws moved in. FML

#21107985
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63585) - you deserved it (5854)

On 04/08/2014 at 9:42pm - misc - by Great (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was feeling horny, so I told my boyfriend, who lives 30 minutes away, that "I really needed him". He replied, "Did you fall in the toilet again?" FML

#21107872
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52225) - you deserved it (11851)

On 04/08/2014 at 7:06pm - intimacy - by that girl (woman) - United States (Alabama)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: