Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MysticAmmu

Online | Search for a member

MysticAmmu

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8273
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.

If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.

I'm also from Thailand and Norway.

MysticAmmu's page activity

Visits<b>patrickeli</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 5:16pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 5:51am<b>zschul1118</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 10:16pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:54pm<b>Posthuman</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:42pm<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:54pm<b>adrian1910</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:53pm<b>Carnage23</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 7:42am<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 3:41pm<b>jamespesche</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:33pm<b>totallylosing</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 8:35am<b>Gremlinek</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 1:06am<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 1:27pm<b>SqueezeMe32</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 6:51am<b>Sp1k3FML</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 1:37am<b>ironfey</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 1:25pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:02am<b>its_bree</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 8:19am

Liked!<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:59am

MysticAmmu's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MysticAmmu's badges

MysticAmmu's favorite FMLs

Today, my 5-year-old son thought it'd be a good idea to pee into the heat vent in the hallway of our apartment building. The whole building now smells like urine. The landlord is a 6-foot ex-convict. He wants answers. FML

#21080782
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43889) - you deserved it (6310)

On 03/07/2014 at 8:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML

#21077978
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48020) - you deserved it (4467)

On 03/04/2014 at 4:06pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

#21076106
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52494) - you deserved it (13372)

On 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm - animals - by Anonytard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was shopping for dresses when my fiancé turned into what I can only call a groomzilla. He told me and my maid of honor that we need to lose weight because he's not "paying all this money for a pair of fatties to not look good." FML

#21075933
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43619) - you deserved it (6738)

On 03/02/2014 at 2:09pm - money - by Ms. Piggy (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25326) - you deserved it (55624)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML

#21071970
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48427) - you deserved it (4465)

On 02/26/2014 at 4:31am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mum asked me how the guinea pig was doing. We don't have a guinea pig. Turns out she had volunteered me to look after the next door neighbor's guinea pig when they were away and 'forgot' to tell me. They have been gone two weeks. FML

#21071021
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48321) - you deserved it (3427)

On 02/25/2014 at 4:59am - animals - by HelpMe (man) - United Kingdom (Scottish Borders, The)

Today, I learned that I'm the only person in my family that our new cat likes. She sleeps on my bed and always sits in my lap and despises everyone else. I'm allergic to cats. FML

#21070365
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42401) - you deserved it (4045)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:05pm - animals - by Good choice cat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom told me all about how I was conceived in a Disney Land toilet. FML

#21070288
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41538) - you deserved it (3650)

On 02/24/2014 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42884) - you deserved it (5446)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I was back home from work drinking coffee when I heard someone open the door with a key. It was my boyfriend, who obviously didn't expect to see me home. We don't live together, and I never gave him a key. FML

#21067356
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46933) - you deserved it (3752)

On 02/21/2014 at 4:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Russian Federation (Lipetsk)

Today, my mom and I flew three hours from Wyoming to a volleyball camp in Kentucky. When we arrived, we went to the volleyball center and told them I was there for the volleyball camp. They told me it had been cancelled two weeks ago and they forgot to call us. FML

#21066263
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49212) - you deserved it (3552)

On 02/20/2014 at 3:57am - health - by maddengirl12 (woman) - United States

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, my brother and I took our cars to get oil changes. While we were there, a guy asked if we were dating. When we told him we were siblings, he responded with, "So?" FML



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: