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50 favourites
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Today, my mom scolded me and threatened to ground me for coming home past midnight. Normally, it wouldn't be unreasonable, except for the fact that I'm 24 years old, and that my parents live with me, in my own house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41281) - you deserved it (3917)
On 05/21/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by mammasboy - United States (Illinois)
Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML
I agree, your life sucks (39755) - you deserved it (3014)
On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was roasting marshmallows around a campfire when mine burst into flames. I instinctively shook the stick to get it to go out. The flaming marshmallow then catapulted straight into my eye, burning my whole eyelid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37915) - you deserved it (21954)
On 05/19/2013 at 1:26am - misc - by Devin - United States
Today, the girl that I've been madly in love with was demanding I tell her who I liked. I told her no, I should just keep it a secret, but she demanded I tell her. After I told her, the only response I got was, "You're right. You should have kept that a secret." FML
I agree, your life sucks (55038) - you deserved it (4865)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:49am - love - by walkingdead_1029 - United States (Arizona)
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend. Being the mature one, I went up to her and said, "Hey, how's it going?" She maced me and kept walking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41208) - you deserved it (9171)
Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18468) - you deserved it (36137)
On 05/05/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by LilaTheGreat - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42209) - you deserved it (3567)
On 05/03/2013 at 9:30pm - work - by annoyedgirl - United States (Washington)
Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41357) - you deserved it (2230)
On 04/26/2013 at 2:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Baja California)
Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (68929) - you deserved it (3077)
On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (52259) - you deserved it (6809)
On 04/22/2013 at 4:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28585) - you deserved it (94585)
Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36508) - you deserved it (4943)
On 04/21/2013 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)
Today, I was about to break up with my psycho girlfriend. As I sat her down, she told me she wanted to show me something. She then took off her shirt to reveal my name tattooed across her chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59912) - you deserved it (6187)
On 04/16/2013 at 3:23am - love - by guess I'm stuck - United States (California)
Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML
I agree, your life sucks (86450) - you deserved it (3209)
On 04/15/2013 at 3:37am - misc - by OPhere (man) - United States (California)
Today, my racist, homophobic, generally degenerate grandmother visited. Within 20 minutes, she uttered multiple racial slurs, said Robert Downey Jr. will burn in hell for playing a black man in one of his movies, and yelled that she'd "whip the piss" out of me, after I asked her to leave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29877) - you deserved it (2861)
On 04/11/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by no tea parties here, gran (man) - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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