Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MysteriousX

Offline (the 08/24/2014 at 1:25am) | Search for a member

MysteriousX

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1876
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

MysteriousX's page activity

Visits<b>hexo21</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:36pm<b>ElricMustang</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 12:32am<b>WilliamMurderfac</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 4:44am<b>pt300</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 3:49am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 5:56am<b>Nightray</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 2:22am<b>adri460</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 12:28am<b>CheckMyProfile</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 11:28pm<b>tylergonmad</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 9:37pm<b>RenbewDesh</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 8:21pm<b>ToriDiane</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 7:57pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 11:10am<b>jesssalynnne</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:21pm<b>Kholonie</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:18pm<b>chutney_02</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 11:15am<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 11:15pm<b>JonoS15</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 6:03pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 9:22pm

MysteriousX's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of MysteriousX's badges

MysteriousX's favorite FMLs

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43281) - you deserved it (5253)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54928) - you deserved it (27602)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I found out the unionized cleaning people that empty the garbage and clean the toilets make $19/hr and have more paid time off than I do with my college degree. FML

#20870911
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46258) - you deserved it (6502)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
518 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17855) - you deserved it (128336)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the messages. Someone answered. FML

#20863583
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45323) - you deserved it (2405)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

Today, I found out that my grandma is a well-loved member of a notorious biker gang. Meanwhile, I'm a 32-year-old, single, minimum-wage nobody with no friends to speak of. She's probably getting more action than I ever will. FML

#20860751
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38821) - you deserved it (6294)

On 08/30/2013 at 7:37pm - misc - by no life to fuck :/ (man) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML

#20857270
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53152) - you deserved it (6907)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm - work - by nowork - United States (New York)

Today, I bought a cat. Somehow that cat is now stuck inside my antique piano. I have to break the piano to get her out. FML

Today, I could hear my daughter playing with her Barbie dolls in her room. "Do you think your boss will agree to give you a raise?", she said. "Of course, we slept together!" My daughter is six. FML

#20856377
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48512) - you deserved it (8062) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/27/2013 at 6:32am - kids - by Poly24 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I spent half-an-hour listening to my therapist telling me enthusiastically how people used to communicate telepathically before verbal languages were invented. FML

#20847442
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36286) - you deserved it (3271)

On 08/21/2013 at 3:18am - misc - by verydepressed - Russian Federation (Tomsk)

Today, I had a group presentation. I kept zipping my jacket up and down nervously. As I waited for my turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me. I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket. I only had a bra on underneath. FML

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
111 comments

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67190) - you deserved it (8852)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML

#20820474
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46032) - you deserved it (2753)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:09pm - work - by Neanderthals walk among us (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: