Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MysteriousX

Offline (the 08/24/2014 at 1:25am) | Search for a member

MysteriousX

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1866
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

MysteriousX's page activity

Visits<b>hexo21</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:36pm<b>ElricMustang</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 12:32am<b>WilliamMurderfac</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 4:44am<b>pt300</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 3:49am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 5:56am<b>Nightray</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 2:22am<b>adri460</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 12:28am<b>CheckMyProfile</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 11:28pm<b>tylergonmad</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 9:37pm<b>RenbewDesh</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 8:21pm<b>ToriDiane</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 7:57pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 11:10am<b>jesssalynnne</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:21pm<b>Kholonie</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:18pm<b>chutney_02</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 11:15am<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 11:15pm<b>JonoS15</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 6:03pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 9:22pm

MysteriousX's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of MysteriousX's badges

MysteriousX's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to an attractive guy, but I was so nervous that I got tongue-tied and then blurted out, "Stupid autocorrect." FML

#20501923
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16260) - you deserved it (27282)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:57am - misc - by tongue tied - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I checked out a "confessions" page for my university. The first confession was from a guy who whacked off in a campus restroom then used a computer in a lab without washing his hands. I work in that lab. FML

#20501884
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34972) - you deserved it (2941)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the local pet store to purchase a large dog bed so my dog wouldn't sleep in mine. After I got home and set up her bed, I realized I forgot to buy dog treats. When I came home again, her new bed was torn to shreds, and she was still sleeping on my bed. FML

#20501469
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25330) - you deserved it (5273)

On 02/10/2013 at 8:51pm - animals - by akasoor - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I casually mentioned to my dad that it was the Chinese New Year yesterday. He accused me of insulting his intelligence by "making stupid shit up." I explained that it's real, and that we just use the Gregorian calendar, hence the different dates. He responded by grounding me. FML

#20501411
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29717) - you deserved it (4062)

On 02/10/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by must be adopted (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, really desperate to get a job, I filled out an application for a dishwashing job. My application got tossed out, because I'm not an economics major like the other guy applying for the same job. FML

#20500922
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25913) - you deserved it (2206)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:55pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born and only took one of the two tests. I haven't cheated. He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checked again. FML

#20500417
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33871) - you deserved it (3241)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by Totallyscrewed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

#20498469
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26477) - you deserved it (2839)

On 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57388) - you deserved it (10869)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I won $50 on the lottery. On the subway home, I checked my pocket to see if the money was still there. A very professional man in a suit yelled, "Hey, that's mine!" I got several dirty glares. I'm such a pathetic wimp that I gave him the money. FML

#20497390
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12690) - you deserved it (49704)

On 02/07/2013 at 7:28pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had drinks at a friend's house before going out to a concert. I still had a bottle of beer left, so I brought it along with me. I got kicked out five minutes into the show for bringing my own drink, which is apparently against the rules. I paid $75 to get kicked out over a $3 drink. FML

#20496974
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9478) - you deserved it (41978)

On 02/07/2013 at 12:11pm - misc - by loquacious shit stain (woman) - Australia

Today, I was at an estate sale of my neighbor who recently passed. I recognized many items for sale that I had ordered or won on eBay from the past 8 years. Turns out the little old lady had been stealing my mail for close to a decade. FML

#20496903
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37788) - you deserved it (3405)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:24am - misc - by GarageSallin (man) -

Today, I told my sister that boys are stronger than girls. She responded by beating the living crap out of me to prove me wrong. She's twelve. I'm eighteen. FML

#20496678
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11395) - you deserved it (55701)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by manhandled by a little girl (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad took me to the empty parking lot of Wal-Mart to try driving for the first time. All was well until he shouted at me for going too slow, which startled me into jerking the wheel and simultaneously stomping on the gas. I don't think Geico covers a Wal-Mart-sized dent in one's car. FML

Today, I asked my mother if I could have my boyfriend sleep over for Valentine's day weekend. Her response? "If you're on your period he can. Unless he's into that. Then no." FML

#20496085
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20651) - you deserved it (38100)

On 02/06/2013 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by dab1230 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a tenant in my apartment block told me about a nice shady place behind our building where he often goes to relax. Curious, I went looking for it. It was a quiet and secluded courtyard. At least until a man came out of nowhere waving a hammer in my face, screaming in a foreign language. FML

#20495981
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23109) - you deserved it (2825)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: