MykalaMonae

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MykalaMonae

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 15 June 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5976
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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MykalaMonae's page activity

Visits<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 1:26am<b>Mmichaelanne</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 6:52pm<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 9:49pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 1:53pm<b>Gemma_Mansonite</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:51am<b>lovelenaa_</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 2:40am<b>turtles4life</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 10:51pm<b>yehyeh</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:08am<b>CheyMiichelle</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 10:31pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 4:30pm<b>notapotato</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 12:07pm<b>ok_kiwi</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 12:19am<b>Iknoweverything</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 7:33pm<b>MissGK</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 12:26am<b>lexxiii</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 9:00am<b>brenda2326</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 10:27pm<b>ChickInGreenVans</b> - the 06/05/2012 at 3:54am<b>shaza575</b> - the 06/05/2012 at 2:34am

MykalaMonae's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of MykalaMonae's badges

MykalaMonae's favorite FMLs

Today, at my school they were having a carnival to raise money. One of the patrons suggested that if they wanted to make money, they should have people pledge money to make me cover my ugly face with a bag. The school got over $500, and I had to wear a bag. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2012 at 7:11pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, while studying liver pathology and highlighting important lines in my textbook, I realized that I could count the number of words I hadn't highlighted on one hand, over the last six pages. FML

by ThisisMedSchool / 11/01/2012 at 5:18pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

by ananymous / 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

by kat / 10/31/2012 at 7:30am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

by poorkids / 10/31/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML

by Lilly / 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm / United States / Animals

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML

by LonelyMe / 10/30/2012 at 9:27am / Love

Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML

by CutestBoysEver / 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I broke a nail at school. The edge kept getting caught on things, so I thought I could file it down by rubbing it on my jeans. Apparently it looked like I was doing something else, because I was called into the principal's office to discuss why "certain things" should be done in private. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2012 at 8:39pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was complimented for having amazingly lifelike warts as part of my witch costume, and was asked how I achieved the effect so well. I didn't have the heart to admit they were just my pimples under green makeup. FML

by mistickfae / 10/29/2012 at 2:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend what she got me for my half birthday, to which she replied "A baby." She was serious. FML

Today, my dad watched the news and decided to start preparing for Hurricane Sandy by buying $300 worth of long-life and canned food. We live in Australia. FML

by StormSeason / 10/29/2012 at 8:03am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm / United States / Kids

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

by prettylady? / 10/28/2012 at 12:22am / United States / Love

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

by Monkey / 10/27/2012 at 11:02am / United States / Intimacy