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MykalaMonae's FML badges
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
MykalaMonae's favorite FMLs
by argh / 02/24/2010 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Work
Today, before my date came to pick me up, I put tissues under my arms so I wouldn't leave wet marks. I forgot to remove them, and when we got physical, they fell out, looking like I'd stuffed my bra. FML
by kiki / 02/24/2010 at 12:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I was working when an older lady came up to buy a coffee. Her son cried for a cup of whipped cream to snack on. She shook her head, silently telling me to say no. I said we were out. The mother took her drink and said, "I'm sorry honey, but the mean man said you couldn't have any." FML
by nichaneely / 02/09/2010 at 10:32pm / United States (Tennessee) / Work
by kingmetal42 / 02/09/2010 at 2:10pm / Miscellaneous
by oldschool / 01/22/2010 at 9:10pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML
by badsister / 01/10/2010 at 10:37am / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML
by sickofsick / 12/29/2009 at 10:11pm / United States / Health
by Cheap / 12/27/2009 at 3:34am / United States (Washington) / Money
by Anonymous / 12/16/2009 at 8:57pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did it, I realized there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper, he never did and came out without socks. FML
by dayum / 12/10/2009 at 4:03pm / Mexico (Chihuahua) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was texting this cute guy that I like. After a couple of minutes I get a missed call from him, I call back and his girlfriend answers and says "Hi this is his girlfriend, please stop calling him". FML
by JennyAndrews / 12/05/2009 at 3:44am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Love
by holla1787 / 12/03/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I went to Walmart with my girlfriend. We bought the usual, food, Advil and condoms. While I waited in line, she went to grab everything. When she came back, I looked in the cart and saw no condoms. I asked her why she didn't get any. She replied "They ran out of smalls." Everyone laughed. FML
by xXxJoe16xXx / 12/01/2009 at 4:11pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally released my first music album. I dropped out of college to pay for it after my friends who liked my music urged me to. They keep telling me how much they love the CD. I've only sold one copy. Turns out they put it on a sharing site so only one of them would have to buy it. FML
by Rob / 12/01/2009 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up after taking a sleep pill for the first time. I started in on a number of chores including paying bills when I noticed a new charge on my online credit card bill from 1am. I bought $120 worth of meat from an infomercial. It's non-refundable. I'm vegetarian. FML
by Anonymous / 11/24/2009 at 7:53am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I'm sick. This wouldn't be such a problem if I wasn't leaving for college in three days, and… Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy in the bedroom, I had already undressed her… Today, my boyfriend went to the ER. I ran to catch the nearest city bus. My sandal breaks. I had to…