MykalaMonae

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MykalaMonae

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 15 June 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7998
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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MykalaMonae's page activity

Visits<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 1:26am<b>Mmichaelanne</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 6:52pm<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 9:49pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 1:53pm<b>Gemma_Mansonite</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:51am<b>lovelenaa_</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 2:40am<b>turtles4life</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 10:51pm<b>yehyeh</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:08am<b>CheyMiichelle</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 10:31pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 4:30pm<b>notapotato</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 12:07pm<b>ok_kiwi</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 12:19am<b>Iknoweverything</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 7:33pm<b>MissGK</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 12:26am<b>lexxiii</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 9:00am<b>brenda2326</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 10:27pm<b>ChickInGreenVans</b> - the 06/05/2012 at 3:54am<b>shaza575</b> - the 06/05/2012 at 2:34am

MykalaMonae's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of MykalaMonae's badges

MykalaMonae's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML

by Ari / 01/16/2013 at 1:36am / Health

Today, I told my mom we get Monday off due to Martin Luther King Jr. day. She then insisted that I had to go to school because that is "only for black people." FML

by Sydney / 01/15/2013 at 6:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

by itsrathersmall / 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

by Bella / 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, after working the midnight shift at my job, I thought it would be nice to leave a sweet love note along with my boyfriend's favourite candy in his car. Upon finding it, he immediately broke up with me for "breaking into" his car. FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2013 at 7:14am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

by Drewbie / 01/13/2013 at 3:53am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML

by GiraffeLover / 01/11/2013 at 6:36am / Australia / Love

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

by kk / 01/09/2013 at 11:07am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a ring box in the pocket of my boyfriend's pants while doing laundry. I eagerly walked up to him knowing that it was an engagement ring, hoping that he would propose on the spot. He tossed it back to me and said, "Well you found it, I don't actually have to ask now, right?" FML

by anonymous / 01/07/2013 at 7:21pm / United States / Love

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

by lifsabtch / 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm / Love

Today, after 3 years with my dream girl, I decided to pop the question by making her complete a scavenger hunt ending in her finding me, suit and everything, by the park bench where we had our first kiss. She came home tired and, instead of following the clues, decided to watch TV all day. FML

by ItRainedOutside / 01/06/2013 at 3:49am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

by anonymous / 01/03/2013 at 5:34am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

by catdog / 01/02/2013 at 1:07am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, at the hospital I work at, I had to deliver my best friend's baby. I later found out that my ex boyfriend was the father. Normally this wouldn't faze me, but it did because we broke up last month. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2012 at 3:25am / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML

by oh my son / 12/23/2012 at 1:02am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous