Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 05/31/2015 at 8:44am) | Search for a member
About MyUsernameIsBest : First of all, I don't know why my username is what it is. I tried to make an account and it said I already had one, and when I tried to reset my password this was the username it gave me. x)
Some random info:
-I'm a madam that loves to write, draw, and read, and adores animals!
-You are welcome to message me, I love to chat and I will almost always reply. (:
-I am a proud Christian.
-I love country and rock music
-I love psychology and tend to bring up random facts about everything.
-I say "dude" and "homie" a lot in real life, but I have no clue why.
-I don't swear. Yeah I'm a dork/lame/loser etc I don't really care.
-I'm in marching band, and I play the alto saxophone, and piano.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of two years and asked if he wanted to go to ball with me. His response was "The person you are trying to message cancelled their phone service and moved to Mexico. Taco taco burrito." I'll take that as a no. FML
Today, I played in a high school concert. Some alumni of the band were sitting in the audience and were brought to tears. Not because it was beautiful, but because they were sad to see how much the music program had declined since they left. FML
Today, the day before I'm supposed to leave for a long-anticipated trip to Europe, my mother admitted that she's never paid for it. She only told me she did so I would stop hinting that I wanted to go. I gave up Christmas for this trip. FML
Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML
Friday 3 July 2015