MyChemical

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MyChemical

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 February 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1354
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About MyChemical : Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh












:)






:O









Stop reading.











I said stop :(









Fine...

MyChemical's page activity

Visits<b>Frowny</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 7:13pm<b>armattiuzzo</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 7:59pm<b>booman342</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 9:48am<b>drcleggles</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 3:10pm<b>APHPrussia</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 12:34pm<b>msk1155</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 6:54pm<b>Kitten_love</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 1:30pm<b>bardo264</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:20pm<b>kawaii666</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 1:03am<b>ontheFLY4</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 4:55pm<b>JupiterPainon</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 10:48pm<b>Bisnaga</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 7:21am<b>wondercat40</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 1:25pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 5:40am<b>Zx_MaSsAcRe_xZ</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 5:29pm<b>idkbands</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 5:28pm<b>OkapiParade</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:01pm<b>Bass_Predator</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:25pm

MyChemical's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

MyChemical's favorite FMLs

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

by breakinphones / 02/19/2011 at 9:03pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got banned on Club Penguin because I said "shit" while I was in a fight with another penguin about whose igloo is cooler. Shouldn't I have better things to do on a Friday night? FML

by courtbabbbby / 02/12/2011 at 1:30am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 1:32pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic-Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up... out my left nostril. FML

by DeepTaccer / 10/30/2010 at 5:28pm / United Kingdom (Norfolk) / Health

Today, I was told I look like Susan Boyle. FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2010 at 7:44pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

by awesome / 09/21/2010 at 12:49am / United States (Arizona) / Animals

Today, I woke up to my husband slowly pulling my blanket off me. I thought he was being romantic until I realized it was because the cat had puked all over me while I was sleeping. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2010 at 12:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I had diarrhea in a Walmart bathroom for 15 minutes. Apparently, so did the guy in the stall next to me. He attempted to make small talk to pass the time. FML

by wantontsu / 09/11/2010 at 2:59pm / Health

Today, I found out the "small termite problem" the inspector told me about wasn't so small when a box from the attic fell through the floor and hit me in the head. FML

by concusion / 08/23/2010 at 5:03am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I had an elderly woman come up to me and tell me how well I pull off the look of being bald. She said that most women can't look attractive without hair. Then she asked me if I had cancer. I had to explain to her that I am, in fact, a man, and I shave my head because I'm a swimmer. FML

by Jayswizzle / 08/11/2010 at 4:10am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML

by JDLAX1924 / 08/05/2010 at 7:24pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML

by kinky / 08/04/2010 at 8:24pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML

by Noname / 03/05/2009 at 2:44pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

by The Sbeak / 02/13/2009 at 10:54am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy