Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 03/22/2015 at 10:17am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 February 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 754
  • Number of comments : 79
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Murilirum : Name: Austin
Kik: Murilirum
Snapchat: Murilirum

Creep me, I'll creep you back

I'm a Web Designer & UX Specialist, that is my dream career and I love doing it every single day! I own my own company so I work a lot.

The statements that keeps me going:
- Decide what it is you want. Write that shit down. Make a fucking plan. And... Work on it. Every. Single. Day.
- Censorship is like telling a man he cannot have a steak, because a baby cannot chew it.
- You can tell a lot about a person by how they treat someone; who can do nothing for them in return.

Feel free to message me, don't be shy! Always up for a conversation about nothing in particular! I just want to chat (I prefer Kik, but that's your choice, I check FML daily so it works) !

You read my entire description, may as well say hi. ✌️

I won't usually start a message, but I'll carry one on as long as you want to!

***I prefer Kik because it notifies me of messages, but that's ultimately up to you!***

Murilirum's page activity

Visits<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 7:11pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 2:32am<b>vlalam</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 12:13am<b>kinsmas</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 7:05am<b>arasx0</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:21pm<b>dudefromasia</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 9:18am<b>nwaugh72</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:09am<b>culphy</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 5:19pm<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 11:43pm<b>demi94</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 10:58am<b>lizzy_r_b_94</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:59pm<b>Laney71</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 7:53pm<b>wookieewhosshe</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:31pm<b>Stripes12345</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 6:29pm<b>zenkuru</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 12:58am<b>redbootsarecool</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 12:28pm<b>ines2473</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 4:08pm<b>theflyingellis</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 8:41pm

Fucked!<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 1:11am<b>demi94</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 12:12pm<b>wookieewhosshe</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 1:33am<b>hailleylynn</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 5:56am<b>this_ghetto</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 4:31am<b>younggirl101</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 3:06am<b>abby1212</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 3:33am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 11:09pm<b>rhysfucker</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 10:27pm<b>Sora_McKain</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 12:06pm<b>137113715</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 7:19am<b>love_struck97</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 9:41pm<b>juststephhere</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 7:38pm<b>LaurenLo</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 5:18am<b>kinzopinzi</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 10:24pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 1:24pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 7:32pm<b>zBerryz</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 1:46pm

Murilirum's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Murilirum's badges

Murilirum's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on a dinner date with a guy I really like. I guess I was on my phone too much because halfway through the date he sent me a text saying how much my half of the bill would be. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16593) - you deserved it (110063)

On 10/02/2013 at 8:43am - love - by Lilly (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was going to fight the guy who my girlfriend left me for. While waiting at the park, he sent me a video of the two of them having sex on my bed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (65936) - you deserved it (21446)

On 07/07/2013 at 8:35am - love - by SimG (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML


I agree, your life sucks (66718) - you deserved it (5786)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by OnPlanetVenus (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML


I agree, your life sucks (90322) - you deserved it (5659)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML


I agree, your life sucks (84029) - you deserved it (25914)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55839) - you deserved it (9897)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38678) - you deserved it (22607)

On 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm - misc - by Username -

Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashed my lights and honked. I floored it and passed the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flipped off drove by honked and waved. FML


I agree, your life sucks (7856) - you deserved it (92076)

On 07/08/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by AmberKCole (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34818) - you deserved it (314644)

On 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by ouchers (woman) - United States (Texas)

Juliette Bubulle's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Juliette's illustrated FML
  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: