Mr_Serious

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Mr_Serious

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11347
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Mr_Serious's page activity

Visits<b>Kvothee</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 4:46pm<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 8:36pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:00pm<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 11:30am<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 5:48am<b>jane00</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 6:57pm<b>rmr05m</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 1:25pm<b>dfens</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 6:32am<b>wlddog</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 1:25am<b>scotty122</b> - the 04/03/2011 at 7:32pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:01am<b>growlers</b> - the 12/13/2010 at 6:27am<b>DogmaT</b> - the 02/21/2010 at 4:06pm<b>sexy_cali_girl</b> - the 02/21/2010 at 3:36pm<b>maxene</b> - the 11/25/2009 at 11:59am<b>exile529</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 5:29pm<b>Alexis774</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 12:57am<b>username666</b> - the 04/29/2009 at 5:19pm

Mr_Serious's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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Mr_Serious's favorite FMLs

Today, while working my job as a cashier, one of the customers that came to the register was a midget. As part of store policy, I had to ID him, and his driver's license said he was from Florida. So I asked, without catching myself, "How's the weather down there?" FML

by Failoffel / 05/09/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML

by Jeremy / 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I tried for the first time putting a condom on my boyfriend using my mouth. I freaked out, swallowed, and started choking on the condom. FML

by notsexy / 05/09/2009 at 11:51am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weedwacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgetting that I am mowing where the dogs go to the restroom, I absent-mindedly weedwack over dog poop. Which got flung into my face. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2009 at 11:50am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

by rawkdinosawr / 05/09/2009 at 11:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML

by t-dawg / 05/09/2009 at 12:18am / United States (Minnesota) / Transportation

Today, I woke up and went into the bathroom and noticed a dark mass in the toilet. Thinking someone took a dump and didn't flush, I approached the toilet ready to dispose of it. That's when I noticed its whiskers and ears. It was a rat, and it was alive. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2009 at 11:03pm / United States / Animals

Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML

by Oblivious / 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm / Kuwait / Love

Today, I found my mother wandering the halls of my fraternity unescorted and asked why she was here, she told me she was concerned when I didn't pick up my phone for two days. She then informed me that she had also moved to the same city I live in. My mother moved over 600 miles to stalk me. FML

by PetitPrincePerdu / 05/07/2009 at 8:42pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Kids

Today, I had a phone interview with my potential new boss. I was getting excited about the prospects of landing a great job. I had nailed every question the man asked me and right after he told me he'll call me tomorrow if he wants me to come in I sweetly said, "Talk to you tomorrow, Love you" FML

by jobless / 05/07/2009 at 5:10pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I found out that the guy i've been having sex with for over a month didn't know my name until today. No wonder he always ever called me 'baby.' FML

by ummPORQUE / 05/07/2009 at 12:17pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

by eeh / 05/07/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

by Familyskank / 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML

by Jinthebar / 05/06/2009 at 12:13am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went to donate blood for the first time. When they stuck the needle in my arm, I had a panic attack and begged that they take it out. The woman helping me told me she'd take it out in a moment and left. It was then that the Red Cross stole a pint of my blood while I had a panic attack. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 8:22pm / United States (Virginia) / Health