![[fr]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About Mr_Hacobo : I'm real cool like.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I found out that my wife of 5 years has decided to change everything: job, clothes, hair style, car, and me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9536) - you deserved it (847)
On 01/06/2012 at 2:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24700) - you deserved it (6506)
On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9914) - you deserved it (1531)
On 12/27/2011 at 2:53pm - misc - by ericane27 - United States
Today, I was at work handling the cash register. It wasn't working correctly, so I apologized to the woman I was waiting on for the delay and explained, "The cash register's being a little retarded today." Then I noticed her clearly "special" adult son standing behind her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9711) - you deserved it (43518)
On 12/22/2011 at 10:23am - work - by insomnia (woman) - United States
Today, after having spent days working on it, I finished off a really elaborate seasonal greetings card for my boss. When I gave it to him, he took one look at it, flicked it in his trash can and said, "Fuck off, Steve." So much for a Christmas bonus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12636) - you deserved it (12872)
On 12/05/2011 at 7:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34055) - you deserved it (2248)
On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he suddenly pulls out and says, "Pull my penis." So I pulled his penis and he farted. Then he started doing it again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25696) - you deserved it (4617)
On 11/16/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by halloweed (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31720) - you deserved it (2010)
On 11/03/2011 at 5:18am - misc - by Grounded (woman) - United States
Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24652) - you deserved it (6190)
Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40684) - you deserved it (11118)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30062) - you deserved it (5613)
On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)
Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (10018) - you deserved it (1539) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11781) - you deserved it (928)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved
Today, somebody ordered pizza and sent it to the house across the street from them, so they could shoot at the pizza guy with an air-soft gun from the upstairs of their house. I was that delivery guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22517) - you deserved it (1242)
On 10/13/2011 at 4:17am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26046) - you deserved it (7623)
On 10/04/2011 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by Username - United States
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
