Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About Mr_Bleepdabloop : Hi, welcome I guess. Mmmmmm alright if you care to know about me I'll talk. I am currently a 1st year architecture major who is also doing an Internet radio show mostly so I can take a break from all the stress and listen to my music.
I am a first generation American, both of my parents were born and raised in Bolivia. As you could imagine I had to deal with the usual hate from racist bastards, but it all good since I am more of a mellow person. I tend to be really philosophical at time and a complete dumbass the next so if I say something stupid, sorry.
Um also I have had a error life with quite a lot of unusual stories that I like to tell people. They like them so I like telling. O and feel free to message me, I don't know how that works though since I only use the mobile version. Have wonderful lives and find your peace.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, I woke up and saw that my alarm clock had fallen on the floor. It read 9:05 am. I panicked because I was late for work. As I frantically got ready, I went to pick my alarm clock up to place it back on my nightstand when I realized it was upside down. The actual time was 5:06. FML
Today, a girl from my college, who's been following me around for months, finally asked me out. Not being interested, I politely declined. Now she's convinced everyone that we hooked up and that I have an incredibly small penis. FML
Today, I was cooking something I knew would make a lot of smoke, so I asked my teenage daughter to tape a bag over the smoke detector. She said she did, so I cooked; the alarm went off and firemen came. She hadn't taped over the smoke detector, she'd taped it over the doorbell. FML
Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML
Today, I was walking down my very steep basement stairs when I fell and rolled all the way down but luckily I didn't hurt anything. While walking back up around the very last stair, my cat jumped out on me, causing me to roll all the way back down. FML
Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML
Today, the gas station right in front of my apartment had people listening to loud music all night. I have this 3 hour test at 7:30am and didn't get any sleep. Worst of all, here in Brazil, calling the police won't help a thing. Instead of actually helping, they'll stop and join the party. FML
Friday 22 May 2015