MrCoolPants

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Offline (the 01/08/2014 at 4:36am)

MrCoolPants

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 May 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 840
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About MrCoolPants : I like pie

MrCoolPants's page activity

Visits<b>alex997</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 5:12pm<b>saxaddict122</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 4:03pm<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 7:01am<b>One_Way</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:35am<b>Yolomcswaggin420</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 8:35pm<b>ErnestoHernandez</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 11:07pm<b>__Zorro__</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 8:04pm<b>BreannaLeeRenee</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 2:06am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 12:57am<b>najraa</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 2:16pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 6:00am<b>elibel</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:01pm<b>rabechan</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 9:30pm<b>dawanjony</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:21am<b>ZaTitanz</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 12:23am<b>Joshido</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 2:39pm<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 1:36pm<b>KyngJulian</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 2:06pm

MrCoolPants's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of MrCoolPants's badges

MrCoolPants's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

by Saradee / 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

by orgasmicriding / 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation

Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML

by lingling / 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

by childhoodupinsmoke / 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

by Targeted / 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught three kids setting fire to a bush. After chasing them off, I parked my bike by a house and went to get water. After I'd put the fire out, I walked back to my bike just in time to see the kids running off with it. FML

by Isoldael / 11/07/2011 at 4:38am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

by ...... / 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML

by SimpleSwimmer / 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I got mad at my 4 year old son for cussing me out. Afterwards, I went upstairs to get ready for the day. When I came back downstairs I found him pooping on my brand new leather couch. FML

by kewtness_17 / 10/01/2011 at 7:10pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

by Revalation / 08/27/2011 at 7:06pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

by creepedout / 07/31/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML

by Tootie / 07/30/2011 at 2:58am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, my step dad stole over $400 worth of savings from me. He spent it on alcohol, fireworks, and a very large sombrero. FML

by _TaToRtOt_ / 07/18/2011 at 9:08am / United States (Virginia) / Money