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About MrConcise : ►► FML's Self-Proclaimed Resident Smartass Pseudointellectual ◄◄
Though our troubles and woes are relentless and unforgiving, we may rejoice as we rekindle one another's flames to familiar vibrancy; we burn brightest with the strength of unity.
I'm going to buy a piece of land, build a pool on it, and then buy a houseboat for said pool. Talk about inefficiency. Anybody wanna live on my pool with me?
An hourglass is only beautiful when you admire the grains instead of counting them.
Stop making yourself miserable just to extend your life a few years; indulge in pleasures, don't cling to a life you can't enjoy.
You sure know how to party?
You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML
Today, what few friends I have won't talk to me anymore. My ex told them she dumped me because I abused her. I never abused her. What really happened is that she dumped me in a rage after I refused to give her money for drugs. Nobody's even asked for my side of the story. FML
Today, I saw a long black hair coming out of the drain. Thinking it was my sister's, I called her in and pulled it out for her to see, only to realize I was actually pulling out a long brown roach by the antenna. FML
Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML
Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't really take flute lessons after all. In related news, every time my best friend supposedly drives her to flute lessons, he's actually taking her to his house for a different kind of activity. FML
Thursday 22 January 2015