Mortoli

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Offline (the 04/26/2016 at 9:51pm)

Mortoli

6Fucked!

MortoliMortoli
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 January 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5335
  • Number of comments : 337
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mortoli : Mostly a loner. But love gaming and anime. I am a security guard. if you ever see a tall guy with headphones in his ears probably me listening to rock. Or techno or X-ray dog. And if you ever wanna chat I'm always up to it. I'm on fml almost daily. I'm always waiting for next persons story.

Mortoli's page activity

Visits<b>MaknaeMelanie</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 1:27pm<b>taylapenguin</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 3:58pm<b>SaveEdit</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 1:22pm<b>Mons</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 1:41am<b>lucythomson</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 10:08am<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 4:27pm<b>43bubba34</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 11:15am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 10:59pm<b>jessmonkey</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 8:26am<b>satanicdaydream</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 2:46pm<b>EnigmaticSoul</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 11:06pm<b>seepin</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 5:53am<b>frrrrr</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 3:33pm<b>Sathane</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 7:16pm<b>Blackhawk706</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 10:11am<b>aspecialspecial</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:40pm<b>kagome513</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 12:43am<b>Philintheblankz</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 9:18am

Fucked!<b>aspecialspecial</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:28am<b>thatperson35423</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 11:24pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 2:14am<b>missmoschner</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 5:24pm<b>xoreggie</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 8:11am<b>bmolover57</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 4:18am

Mortoli's FML badges

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Mortoli's badges

Mortoli's favorite FMLs

Today, I have a stomach bug. I went to go downstairs, and my cat decided to dart between my legs, causing me to trip and fall down the stairs in a pinwheel of vomit. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2016 at 12:17am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, my dad got drunk and decided to fix everything in the house he thought was broken. Now the oven won't cook, half the floorboards from the stairs are piled in the garden, we put the TV back together but now it is stuck on mute, and we still have no idea where he has put my bedroom door. FML

by bob the builders pissed off daughter / 12/29/2015 at 6:52pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting my picture taken with my mom and grandma for a portrait. I said it was going to be beautiful when it was done, with three generations of our family in it. My grandma said that would be true, if I weren't adopted. FML

Today, while at a fastfood restaurant, I wanted to wash my hands. The restrooms were locked, so a cashier got the key and opened the mens restroom. This would have been fine if I wasn't a girl. FML

by turtles_yup / 12/03/2015 at 12:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad sent me $200 by mail, only to mail it to the wrong person. So now some random person is getting $200 from my dad. FML

by Makusu420 / 12/02/2015 at 7:44pm / United States (California) / Money

Today, a police officer pulled me over. He asked me where I was headed, so I jokingly replied, "Probably to jail after you run my name". He laughed and took my information, only to then arrest me for unpaid parking tickets I never received. FML

by Nightbird827 / 12/02/2015 at 9:34am / Miscellaneous

Today, I called the cops on this guy who kept emailing me without revealing who he was. I had told him that if he emailed me again, I would call the cops, so I did. Turns out it was my roommate. FML

by Dark_Cecilia / 12/01/2015 at 5:53pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been having an affair with my childhood bully. FML

by ujellybro234 / 12/01/2015 at 11:52am / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I felt so lonely that I asked Siri to read me Wikipedia articles so that I could pretend I was having a conversation with a real human being. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2015 at 12:49am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was so tired when I got home from work, I took off my bra without removing my shirt which I've done so often it is second nature. I successfully removed the bra, then snagged the clasp on a loose shirt thread, causing my bra to take on a life of its own and slap me in the face. FML

by fryebaby623 / 11/13/2015 at 12:47am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML

by Potato_Lord / 11/11/2015 at 11:11pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Transportation

Today, my father, who is not familiar with keyboards, had me register his new email account for him at the public library. His username choice? "Wang dang sweet poon tang". People heard. FML

by anonymous / 11/05/2015 at 12:05am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, during dinner, my boyfriend slowly walked up next to me, got on one knee, and in one movement pointed at my feet and shouted, "WHAT ARE THOSE?!" FML

by Wtf / 11/03/2015 at 5:06pm / Love

Today, at my prestigious sous chef job, I was preparing to plate up expensive entrees for a function of 150 people. After arriving to work 2 hours early to finalize finishing touches, they call the restaurant 5 minutes before their booking stating, 'We can't be bothered anymore, sorry.' FML

by Chefinblack / 10/19/2015 at 6:13pm / Australia / Work

Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal toilet paper from work. I got caught. FML

by PoorGal / 10/19/2015 at 2:04pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work