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Mortoli

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Mortoli

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 453
  • Number of comments : 136
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mortoli : Mostly a loner. But love gaming and anime. Fluke Mortoli ps3 name.

Mortoli's page activity

Visits<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 2:04pm<b>guskta</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 10:44am<b>bmolover57</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 10:18pm<b>ShadowVapor</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 4:36pm<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 7:47pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:33am<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 8:14pm<b>buonotomato</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 6:02pm<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 5:46pm<b>JJ_86</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 5:25pm<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 7:49am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 2:20pm

Liked!<b>bmolover57</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 4:18am

Mortoli's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Mortoli's badges

Mortoli's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

#21257417
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38908) - you deserved it (4311)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

#21257414
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34590) - you deserved it (3104)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:36am - misc - by Jamestown of Vagina (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46552) - you deserved it (3794)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML

#21236595
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33731) - you deserved it (5751)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I found a piece of erotic fiction on my brother's computer. It involved two lesbian teenagers, who just so happened to have the same names and physical descriptions as my sister and me. FML

#21233221
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42654) - you deserved it (3782)

On 08/09/2014 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis. FML

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41522) - you deserved it (21373)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46754) - you deserved it (6623)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at my grandma's funeral. While giving the eulogy, I accidentally mixed up "You will be missed" and "You won't be forgotten" and instead said "You won't be missed." FML

#21212849
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42352) - you deserved it (6823)

On 07/18/2014 at 12:30pm - misc - by familyhatesme - United States (Washington)

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, my dad finished installing our new home security system. One of the features lets him control any light in the house from his phone. He keeps trying to piss me off by turning my bedroom light on at random intervals. I don't know how to make it stop, and I can't sleep. FML

#21196465
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47224) - you deserved it (4555)

On 07/02/2014 at 5:52pm - misc - by pissed off (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43119) - you deserved it (24032)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got hit by a car while walking into the hospital to visit my wife, who had also gotten hit by a car. FML

#21182903
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56853) - you deserved it (4373)

On 06/21/2014 at 8:50am - health - by anon - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML

#21182176
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41290) - you deserved it (3753)

On 06/20/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by Alex (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)



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