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Mortoli

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Mortoli

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 January 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3406
  • Number of comments : 230
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mortoli : Mostly a loner. But love gaming and anime. Fluke Mortoli ps3 name. And yes the picture is a face of me playing with my food. Lol. It was good. And for all you veggietereans, or however that spelled, lol, sorry for explicit profile pic. In any case I am a security guard and pretty much only thing I enjoy doing outside me house is watching the moon and stars at work 12 hour shift is nice cause I get to watch the rise and set. Most people my age wouldn't like 12 hour shifts at night but I don't mind it. And if you ever see a tall guy with headphones in his ears probably me listening to rock. Or techno or X-ray dog. And if you ever wanna chat I'm always up to it. I'm on fml almost daily. I'm always waiting for next persons story. Oh and just now found a fencing sword in my rooms attic closet thing. Only thing on it says Toledo. Message me if interested on teaching me about this sword will add a picture on me profile later.

Mortoli's page activity

Visits<b>bluepanther94</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 2:17pm<b>nana_star</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 5:52am<b>adamant84</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:45pm<b>nkb94</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 8:35pm<b>ziggysmommy201</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 2:20am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 6:37am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 9:04am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:31pm<b>TheAnon1313</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 7:39pm<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 12:43am<b>leahb99</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:36pm<b>__Zorro__</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 10:33pm<b>Littlest_things</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 9:20am<b>wilburhp</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 6:09am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 2:52am<b>ShyAmai</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 8:47pm<b>vertencar</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 5:13pm<b>Miss_Blondie44</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 6:54pm

Fucked!<b>xoreggie</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 8:11am<b>bmolover57</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 4:18am

Mortoli's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Mortoli's badges

Mortoli's favorite FMLs

Today, after helping run salads and bread to a table, they demanded I do something about the bug problem. I would've been more understanding if they hadn't chosen to sit outside. FML

#21435223
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5404) - you deserved it (310)

On 07/02/2015 at 2:40am - work - by smokecloud_ - United States (Ohio)

Today, after replacing several components on my new used car, I realized that the reason it wasn't getting the gas mileage it was supposed to because my coworkers take turns siphoning my gas while I work. FML

#21435168
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9124) - you deserved it (541)

On 07/02/2015 at 12:16am - work - by thatshelpful - United States (Iowa)

Today, my flight was at the other side of the airport. I ran to the gate, to find that the flight had moved to the other side of the airport. So I ran again to miss my plane by a minute. However I did get a new flight... at the other end of the airport. FML

#21434898
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10844) - you deserved it (746)

On 07/01/2015 at 3:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

#21432853
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24030) - you deserved it (3194)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by stillhungry - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend came back from her mission trip with hickies all over her boobs. She said it wasn't cheating because she was doing God's work and that they canceled each other out. FML

#21432849
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27702) - you deserved it (2219)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:29pm - love - by isaidfuckoff (woman) - United States

Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML

#21432346
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11425) - you deserved it (34754)

On 06/26/2015 at 2:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I went to visit my mother after many years. Her hoarding has gotten so bad that now the house is entirely filled with junk and garbage, and she is camping out in the jungle of a backyard, cooking on a cauldron over a fire and shitting in the compost pile, with no working heat or water. FML

#21431843
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (2050)

On 06/25/2015 at 4:03pm - misc - by childofcrazy (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML

#21428077
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25993) - you deserved it (1967)

On 06/18/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend, when a guy pulled a knife and told us to hand over our money. My boyfriend blurted "I don't have shit, dude! She has tons of cash!" The moment the mugger turned to me, my boyfriend ran away at top speed. FML

#21419164
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35883) - you deserved it (2656)

On 06/01/2015 at 2:14pm - misc - by kash (woman) - United States (California)

Today, thanks to some asswipe drunk driver fleeing the cops the wrong way down a one-way street, I've now had my third wreck this year. My insurance premium's now higher than Bob Marley in a weed factory. FML

#21321099
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32945) - you deserved it (3058)

On 12/20/2014 at 7:53pm - money - by financially_wreckd (man) -

Today, my 7-year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of the supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML

#21321028
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29658) - you deserved it (3180)

On 12/20/2014 at 5:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my fiancé pawned off my engagement ring so he could buy himself a PS4. FML

#21320958
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35820) - you deserved it (4463)

On 12/20/2014 at 3:00pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML

#21319982
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34791) - you deserved it (4328)

On 12/18/2014 at 9:39pm - love - by I warned him - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32798) - you deserved it (2537)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after months of saving, I went to buy the wedding ring I promised to buy my fiancée. Just seconds after I walked in, the owner asked me to leave, saying he doesn't serve "trash" like me, while pointing at the memorial tattoo on the back of my hand. FML

#21316839
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32912) - you deserved it (2947)

On 12/13/2014 at 3:21pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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