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Mornai

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Mornai

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  • Town/Country : Springfield, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 May 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6527
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mornai : I've been here for years. Name's James. I enjoy reading the failures, mishaps and common misfortunes of life.

I'm exceptionally calm and it takes a LOT to anger me. I used to be suspiciously happy in life, until a girl came along...

Free to chat on here, kik, Facebook, etc. though I don't use social networks much.

"And if your friend does evil to you, say to him, 'I forgive you for what you did to me, but how can I forgive you for what you did to yourself?'"

Mornai's page activity

Visits<b>shine999</b> - 11 hours ago<b>pptm</b> - 24 hours ago<b>girI</b> - yesterday at 1:48am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:30pm<b>BexBaby86</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:33pm<b>JackSkellingtons</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 8:22pm<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 5:38pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 9:58pm<b>zdane</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 11:12am<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:05pm<b>CCzero</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 5:32am<b>guriak</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 8:47am<b>Ari3l</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 2:38pm<b>crazypeach</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 7:07pm<b>nela25</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:17pm<b>abylenee_</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:33pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 1:15pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:51pm

Mornai's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Mornai's badges

Mornai's favorite FMLs

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23979) - you deserved it (2785)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44483) - you deserved it (3886)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was assigned to write a short story about what we imagine Earth to be like in 500 years, and daily conflicts people experience. My teacher loved it and read it aloud to the class. He asked for my inspiration, and I didn't have the heart to say that I ripped off Mass Effect 3. FML

Today, I was in a mall bathroom when two girls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML

#20067220
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33014) - you deserved it (2548)

On 09/11/2012 at 3:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my grandpa was visiting. My neighbors started blasting out rap music, as they've done nearly 24/7 for months, telling me to fuck off when I complain. He went over and screamed he'd gut them like fish if they didn't pipe down. They did. He's 68 and still more intimidating than me. FML

#20062193
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20082) - you deserved it (4312)

On 09/07/2012 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

#20052962
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19305) - you deserved it (46916)

On 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by WhyAppleWhy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, my boyfriend got a new tattoo. It was a big tattoo of Pikachu on his hip. I told him now I'd feel like I was having sex with an 8-year-old boy. His defense? "No, no, think of it as having sex with Pikachu!" He still refuses to understand why that's weird. FML

#20050023
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24431) - you deserved it (4874)

On 08/30/2012 at 9:08pm - intimacy - by Kat (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

#20024799
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6958) - you deserved it (40501)

On 08/16/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML

#20019911
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27670) - you deserved it (4298)

On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14741) - you deserved it (38409)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finished my first two weeks as an ice cream truck driver. Now I can't get that annoying ice cream truck music out of my head. It's even in my dreams. FML

#20013286
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21824) - you deserved it (3808)

On 08/10/2012 at 9:58am - work - by ice cream dude - United States (Colorado)



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