About Mornai : I enjoy reading the failures, mishaps and common misfortunes of life.
"It's a natural instinct to fight for our own survival. What makes us human is that we fight for others." -AA:T&T
I am a calm and kind person, and it takes an extreme effort to anger me.
I am afraid of heights.
I am always in high spirits.
I am the person who would push on in a zombie apocalypse even if I'm the only one left alive.
I cannot swim. Because of that, i almost drowned in a pool once because the lifeguard was busy trying to be sexy.
I don't get sick often, but when i do it really sucks.
I may laugh if i see you fall, but I'll always be there to pull you up.
Talk to me if you wish, but I'm not very interesting.
“Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.”
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Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20682) - you deserved it (3697)
On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43125) - you deserved it (11797)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24801) - you deserved it (3920) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, a highly intoxicated man came into my workplace and complained that the medicine that I'd prescribed for his dog almost choked him. I work at Blockbuster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21401) - you deserved it (1520)
On 10/09/2011 at 11:30pm - work - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19469) - you deserved it (3043)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by kemando - Canada (Alberta)
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32494) - you deserved it (2304)
On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16118) - you deserved it (32343)
On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)
Today, I bought a UV light so I could detect cat pee, since I was sure my cat was relieving herself on the carpet. I decided to try it out in the living room first. Nearly half the room lit up like a Christmas tree. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24275) - you deserved it (3405)
On 09/25/2011 at 12:15pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35889) - you deserved it (3188)
On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26379) - you deserved it (2116)
On 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I met an old friend from high school and his hot girlfriend. I jokingly said she must be blind to go out with him. His response: "Yeah, she is." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15555) - you deserved it (22990)
On 09/12/2011 at 3:25pm - misc - by aru9 - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I brought my date home to meet my parents. We walked in the front door to find my drunken father wearing nothing but a Viking helmet, and swinging and jabbing our living room furniture with a pool noodle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22163) - you deserved it (1953)
On 09/10/2011 at 3:01pm - misc - by Hailey Antone - United States
Today, my dad met my fiancé's dad for the first time. My fiancé's dad is a cop. He had arrested my dad for indecent exposure in the past. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27723) - you deserved it (1824)
On 09/07/2011 at 9:22pm - intimacy - by lolomg (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, my grandmother pulled down her pants and screamed, "Kiss my ass" in the middle of a packed restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24883) - you deserved it (2404)
On 09/05/2011 at 9:00am - misc - by Brie - United States (Georgia)
Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty, when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here." from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27814) - you deserved it (5180)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:16am - misc - by Pizza-less - United States (Washington)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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