Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Mornai

Online | Search for a member

Mornai

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Springfield, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 May 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7009
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mornai : I've been here for years. I'm James. I enjoy reading the failures, mishaps and common misfortunes of life.

I'm exceptionally calm and it takes a LOT to anger me. I used to be suspiciously happy in life, until a girl came along...

Free to chat on here, kik, Facebook, etc. though I don't use social networks much.

"And if your friend does evil to you, say to him, 'I forgive you for what you did to me, but how can I forgive you for what you did to yourself?'"

Mornai's page activity

Visits<b>umerin</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 2:57pm<b>AmeliaClara</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 12:01pm<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:57pm<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:17pm<b>Si123</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 7:14pm<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 5:39pm<b>Abbbiiieeeeeeeee</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 8:44am<b>PurpZilla</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 7:46pm<b>SpeedToast</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 7:02pm<b>orbit</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 9:02am<b>JackSkellingtons</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 5:35pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 7:23pm<b>laurabev</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 7:21pm<b>girI</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 5:28am<b>Alicestraza</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 4:20am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:32pm<b>shine999</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 11:28pm<b>pptm</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:53am

Liked!<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:16pm

Mornai's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Mornai's badges

Mornai's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

#20526564
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35374) - you deserved it (6783)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

#20526426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24336) - you deserved it (6577) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm - health - by JimiHendrix (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

#20523671
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42820) - you deserved it (5398)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Frostbitten (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was at my friend's house, when she commented that her dog's fur kept getting tangled because of its length. I reached over to tickle his tummy, felt a big tangled knot and agreed that he needed a good grooming. Then I realized what I'd grabbed wasn't fur. FML

#20523003
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26026) - you deserved it (9220)

On 02/26/2013 at 1:09pm - animals - by Puppylove (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my parents told me that I'm no longer allowed to come home from boarding school on weekends because it will confuse my cats and disrupt their lives. FML

#20519879
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40456) - you deserved it (2626)

On 02/24/2013 at 6:17am - animals - by incendiaaa (woman) - Australia

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36166) - you deserved it (3188)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28433) - you deserved it (5991)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML

#20502433
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41431) - you deserved it (3397)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

#20502217
172 comments

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45449) - you deserved it (5932) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, I waited over 30 minutes in freezing cold weather for my bus. When it finally arrived, I went to get on board, but slipped and fell on the icy ground. The driver waited a whole 2 seconds before snorting, "Ain't nobody got time for this shit", closing the doors, and driving off. FML

#20476700
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38780) - you deserved it (2799)

On 01/24/2013 at 4:25pm - misc - by frozensolid (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

#20466782
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26450) - you deserved it (14111)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35401) - you deserved it (3698)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML

#20464395
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30163) - you deserved it (14508)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: