Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Mornai

Offline (9 minutes ago) | Search for a member

Mornai

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Springfield, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 May 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7256
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mornai : I've been here for years. I'm James. I enjoy reading the failures, mishaps and common misfortunes of life.

I'm exceptionally calm and it takes a LOT to anger me. I used to be suspiciously happy in life, until a girl came along...

Free to chat on here, kik, Facebook, etc. though I don't use social networks much.

"And if your friend does evil to you, say to him, 'I forgive you for what you did to me, but how can I forgive you for what you did to yourself?'"

Mornai's page activity

Visits<b>PurpZilla</b> - yesterday at 4:07am<b>ChloeFrance</b> - yesterday at 1:45am<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 1:19pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 11:04am<b>lulinator</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 9:48pm<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:08pm<b>SyntheticSound</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 4:01pm<b>femalefighter</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 12:03pm<b>umerin</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 2:57pm<b>AmeliaClara</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 12:01pm<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:17pm<b>Si123</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 7:14pm<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 5:39pm<b>Abbbiiieeeeeeeee</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 8:44am<b>SpeedToast</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 7:02pm<b>orbit</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 9:02am<b>JackSkellingtons</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 5:35pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 7:23pm

Liked!<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:16pm

Mornai's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Mornai's badges

Mornai's favorite FMLs

Today, while watching TV with my wife, I realized that we were still watching "My Little Pony" even though the kids had been asleep for half an hour. FML

#19495403
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20908) - you deserved it (5123)

On 04/19/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by ajnmegs - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

#19486028
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38244) - you deserved it (3601)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States

Today, another of my dad's blind dates went bad, so I took him out for a beer. I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and when I came back, two guys were congratulating my dad on scoring such a hot piece of ass, and said the sex must be awesome. My dad played along with it. FML

#19472995
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38366) - you deserved it (2791)

On 04/15/2012 at 2:43pm - intimacy - by jonasister (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML

#19453436
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18251) - you deserved it (47454)

On 04/12/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by girly (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML

#19430484
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21689) - you deserved it (4610)

On 04/08/2012 at 2:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was woken up by a call from "the Nuisance Call Prevention Registry". The lady on the telephone didn't see the irony. FML

#19405538
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20949) - you deserved it (1907)

On 04/04/2012 at 6:58am - misc - by Telemarket (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I met separately with the President and Chairman of the company regarding a product that I'm designing. Each ordered me to do the opposite of whatever the other instructed. FML

#19400552
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21056) - you deserved it (2026)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:10am - work - by beagle1 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I dislocated my elbow chasing my cat around the hardwood floors of my house in knee-high socks and wiping out going around a corner. The doctors suggested that I not tell people how it happened. FML

#19362512
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10358) - you deserved it (17655)

On 03/28/2012 at 8:00am - health - by hikari_chan_xo - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML

#19309330
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26342) - you deserved it (2262)

On 03/19/2012 at 7:43pm - animals - by bibi (woman) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML

#19305380
7 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18281) - you deserved it (12720)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

#19276990
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24910) - you deserved it (3030)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by S. Michaels (man) - United States

Today, in the locker room at work, someone tried writing "douche bag" on my locker, and misspelled it four times before apparently giving up. FML

#19255450
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21618) - you deserved it (1836)

On 03/11/2012 at 1:39am - work - by The Last One (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

#19249528
595 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23191) - you deserved it (52970)

On 03/10/2012 at 2:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He gave me a cupcake. FML

#19235270
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21095) - you deserved it (3320)

On 03/07/2012 at 8:08pm - work - by Janitor (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML

#19182988
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9827) - you deserved it (31840)

On 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm - misc - by kal - United States (New York)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: