Missythemini

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Offline (the 08/20/2015 at 5:56pm)

Missythemini

4Fucked!

MissytheminiMissythemini
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 18 December 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1637
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Missythemini's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 12:59am<b>amc597</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 4:43pm<b>mirrriam</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 7:44pm<b>Umbraelux</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:56am<b>DelbertGWIII</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 10:16pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 6:26am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:15am<b>Dexter83</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:00pm<b>imahobbitlol</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 2:39pm<b>ElEsThoCle</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 3:09pm<b>Joel541</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 8:58am<b>Pesticides</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 2:38am<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 11:50pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 10:41am<b>emxy92</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 6:54pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 1:06pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 3:49pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 2:33am

Fucked!<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:50am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 6:06pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 7:33am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 6:55am

Missythemini's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Missythemini's badges

Missythemini's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML

by Wellthisishawkward / 08/14/2015 at 6:40pm / United States / Transportation

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2015 at 11:08am / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I saw a lady leave her infant in a display crib so she could go shopping. When I stopped her and told her she couldn't do that, she said, "Well, I do it all the time". FML

by Oihana / 07/31/2015 at 11:30pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

by strangely / 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was so incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2015 at 8:54pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I had to explain to several young children why asking the new blind girl to play hide and seek with them is inappropriate. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 12:52pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Kids

Today, my 5-year-old won't stop princess-waving at people. This would be fine, but she looks exactly like she is giving the Nazi salute. I got dirty looks from nearly everyone at the supermarket. FML

by momoftheyearedition / 07/08/2015 at 11:13pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, it's been 3 days since I moved into my new house. I'm already known as the neighborhood racist, after some dicksplash thought it'd be funny to tape a sign to my door overnight that said: "DO NOT RING IF YOU ARE A NEGRO AND/OR JEW." FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2015 at 1:42am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" / 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2015 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to take my daughter to the ER. Her brother had bet she couldn't go the whole day without talking. So to win the bet, she tried to super-glue her lips together so she couldn't accidentally say anything. FML

by 1010110100101101 / 06/19/2015 at 12:07pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a woman bitched me out at the grocery store, saying that since I'm not Indian, I shouldn't be wearing a bindi - a red dot on my forehead - because it's "cultural appropriation". I was too embarrassed to tell her it was actually a pimple I'd been trying to pop on my forehead. FML

by unsuccessful popping / 06/18/2015 at 4:09pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my boyfriend to come hang out with me. He said he was busy and had to do homework. Since he never studies, I got suspicious and went to check up on him. I found him playing dress-up with his cat. He's 17. FML

by iamfab / 06/06/2015 at 1:52am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, at work a customer bitched me out for not explicitly telling her that our peanut butter pancakes contain real peanut butter. She's threatening to sue because she's allergic to peanuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 9:07pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2015 at 11:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals