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Missanna12's favorite FMLs
Today, I had a job interview. Everything was going well until I noticed a picture of a dog hanging on the wall, which reminded me of the ending of Marley and Me. I started crying and had to be escorted out. FML
by crybaby / 04/12/2013 at 1:58am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my three year old sister asked me to go to the amusement park with her. Since I was late for work, I politely refused and said we'd go tomorrow. She punched me in the nuts so hard that I could barely walk. FML
by IRum / 08/11/2011 at 4:45am / Russian Federation / Kids
Today, I went snowboarding and fell backwards, hitting my head on a patch of ice. When I got home, I told my brother I thought I might have a concussion. He told me I should be a man and suck it, swiftly smacking my head, causing me to pass out. FML
by milkndstufff / 03/06/2011 at 7:50pm / United States (New York) / Health
Today, I was talking to a friend about this stranger I kissed a few nights ago while drinking. I commented that I was ashamed of doing so, and to make matters worse, the guy was really unattractive. It turns out he was no stranger. I'd kissed my friend. FML
by nina / 08/11/2010 at 12:04pm / Luxembourg (Luxembourg) / Love
by jooshuarr / 06/18/2010 at 7:09pm / Spain (Comunidad Valenciana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I joined a small disaster relief group. I remarked to the big, long-haired person beside me that it was surprising that I was the only female in the group. I got a cold stare. Later I asked another volunteer about that person. He answered, "Oh, her? She's my sister." FML
by Blurry / 09/30/2009 at 3:30pm / Philippines (Batangas) / Work
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML
by Anonymous / 09/26/2009 at 10:18pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I heard a baby crying while I was walking down the street. I walked around until I found it. In a dumpster. I immediately called the cops, completely freaking out. When the cops came, they pulled the baby out of the dumpster. It was a plastic baby doll. FML
by failbaby / 06/02/2009 at 2:18am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
Today, I turned on my camera to find pictures of my dad's secretary giving him a blowjob. Minutes later, I hear a scream from another room as my 12-year-old sister discovers similar pictures on HER camera. Mom and dad say it's no big deal. FML
by rexob / 02/04/2009 at 10:51am / United States (California) / Intimacy