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MissMustard

Offline (the 10/11/2014 at 1:30pm) | Search for a member

MissMustard

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 676
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissMustard : A fun-loving country girl from the Cotswolds, now studying in London!

MissMustard's page activity

Visits<b>JOEBOBARNOLD</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 9:33pm<b>Jenra</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 12:55pm<b>masteraegis</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:00pm<b>zoepie</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 6:27am<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 4:58am<b>seninaa</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 3:50pm<b>hazerdagreek</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 2:18am<b>MikeyScene420</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 12:14am<b>swedish_jesus</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 3:23am<b>flatout4</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 8:10pm<b>anchorsaweigh003</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 12:57am<b>Ohotsk</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 3:00pm<b>sroseh10</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 4:35pm<b>sazaraa</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 6:10pm<b>punjabi209</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 4:46pm<b>AshleaJstudent</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 6:39am<b>Rainboehed</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 8:27pm<b>michaelalaynee</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 6:18pm

MissMustard's FML badges

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See all of MissMustard's badges

MissMustard's favorite FMLs

Today, I called a tree removal company to have my diseased elm removed. When I got home from work, I was surprised to find it still there. Not as surprised as my neighbor was to discover that his tree was missing, nor as surprised as his children when they saw there was no more tree-house. FML

#20790198
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53607) - you deserved it (4008)

On 07/18/2013 at 10:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I overheard my ripped, handsome, genetically perfect brother telling my mom how "fat people" make him "nervous". I have only recently accepted my weight, after struggling for years. I now understand why my brother rarely talks to me. FML

#20790160
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48430) - you deserved it (6213)

On 07/18/2013 at 9:53am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my pre-teen brother has started using the entire Axe line because he believes that it will give him an "edge with the ladies". He insists on using the products at least three times a day, including before bedtime. I'm allergic to anything that is perfumed. We share a room. FML

#20790014
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47205) - you deserved it (3194)

On 07/18/2013 at 5:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend began to stroke my nose. "You can pick your girlfriend, but you can't pick your girlfriend's nose," I said playfully. In response, he shouted "Yes, I can!" before painfully jamming his pinky up my left nostril. FML

#20789918
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39027) - you deserved it (13702)

On 07/18/2013 at 3:41am - misc - by booger (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while texting my boyfriend, I noticed that he copies and pastes old messages so he doesn't have to write new ones. FML

Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML

#20788974
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54604) - you deserved it (17019)

On 07/17/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by WasntMe - United States

Today, the family I live with decided that beer is a more important purchase than the things we need, such as detergent, soap, and toilet paper, just to name a few things. Apparently, paper towels should suffice. FML

Today, while walking into a hotel room, I passed by a full-sized mirror. My reflection scared me so badly that I punched the mirror, which then shattered and resulted in several cuts to my hand. FML

#20788837
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21735) - you deserved it (37949)

On 07/17/2013 at 5:44pm - misc - by igotsbadluck - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML

#20788707
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62286) - you deserved it (22187)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my family. Over the next hour, a huge religious debate erupted, and my grandfather drunkenly told us all how he almost killed himself once while experimenting with auto-erotic asphyxiation. My boyfriend called us all crazy and seems to have dumped me. FML

#20788678
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45409) - you deserved it (4946)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:13pm - love - by fuck family (woman) - Poland (Dolnoslaskie)

Today, an old lady steamrolled over my foot with her wheelchair, then laughed as she slowly rolled away, leaving my toes in ruins. FML

#20788409
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41132) - you deserved it (3438)

On 07/17/2013 at 1:38pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

#20752893
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49820) - you deserved it (5736)

On 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm - work - by DocKreso (man) - Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska)

Today, after months of incredibly painful stomach cramps, I convinced my mom that I needed to see a doctor. Not even 2 minutes into the exam, the doctor tells me that I'm heavily constipated and advised some "prune juice" to help "clear all that shit out". My mom won't stop laughing at me. FML

#20751604
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40703) - you deserved it (5188)

On 06/27/2013 at 11:57pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided to wake me up from a nap by kissing me. I started kissing her back passionately, when she slapped me. Apparently, kissing her back automatically without "confirming her identity" counts as cheating. FML

#20688020
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58821) - you deserved it (3983)

On 05/26/2013 at 8:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)



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