Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MissKris44

Search for a member

MissKris44

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 October 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 247
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

MissKris44's page activity

Visits<b>smurfsarwales</b> - the 10/16/2011 at 1:12pm

MissKris44's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of MissKris44's badges

MissKris44's favorite FMLs

Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though, with my cat. FML

#18145611
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24419) - you deserved it (9358)

On 11/03/2011 at 6:56am - animals - by Nicole557 (woman) - United States

Today, I'm very ill. My throat and glands are so swollen that whenever I fall asleep, I relax too much and cut off my own air. The doctor said it's a viral infection and there's nothing they can give me, so I can choose between trying to kill myself by sleeping or staying awake for the next few days. FML

#18126766
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34017) - you deserved it (2311)

On 11/01/2011 at 2:29am - health - by DirtyCharmed - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was at work at a nursing home I was attempting to dress a woman for bed. She popped me a left hook and I had to ask the nurse to look at my jaw. After my nurse said I was okay she asked me to continue getting the woman dressed for bed. She hit me 5 more times. FML

#18094107
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22835) - you deserved it (2214)

On 10/28/2011 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while dancing at my studio, our instructor was giving us all characters opposite of ourselves to portray in an improv solo. My friends got cool things like "creepy" and "vulnerable". I got "extremely sexy". FML

#18085773
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26830) - you deserved it (3479)

On 10/27/2011 at 12:00am - misc - by apparentlyunsexy - United States (Texas)

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

#18072283
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33762) - you deserved it (2814)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:04pm - kids - by mew - Canada

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51954) - you deserved it (16578)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to explain to a patient that no, her nipples were not slowly getting smaller. FML

#17958269
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21136) - you deserved it (2135)

On 10/11/2011 at 5:43am - work - by Anony-moose (woman) - United States

Today, I took my friend with me for a radiology scan. While I was getting injections, my friend muttered, "On the bright side, if you die, you'll glow in the dark at the funeral." FML

#17952453
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23635) - you deserved it (3168)

On 10/10/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by radioactiveglowinthedarkthing (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, while waiting in line at Gamestop, another customer and the cashier started chatting about how Pokémon is for kids, and anyone over 10 who's into it is weird. Embarrassed, I put the new Pokémon game back on the shelf and snuck out of the store. FML

#17830762
562 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29097) - you deserved it (17309)

On 09/25/2011 at 3:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML

#17821676
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13108) - you deserved it (77009)

On 09/24/2011 at 2:47pm - misc - by essay2 - United States (California)

Today, I found out my roommate thinks the sink is an appropriate place to wash his junk. FML

#17617365
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22663) - you deserved it (2374)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:56pm - misc - by SinkyBalls - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

#17283152
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29952) - you deserved it (15533)

On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

#17184971
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36118) - you deserved it (5290)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

#17109395
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18977) - you deserved it (45947)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10261) - you deserved it (43166)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: