MissFortune

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MissFortune

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14420
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MissFortune's page activity

Visits<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 7:07pm<b>stryggzy</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 2:50pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 6:23pm<b>ShutUp007</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 5:09pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:59pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 2:05pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:54pm<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 4:50pm<b>Josh_is_a_Bear</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 4:39pm<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 1:27pm<b>constipation</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:42pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 1:32pm<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 10:18pm<b>rjt93</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 7:14am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:51am<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 7:42am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:43am<b>valipali</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 4:33pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 11:59pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 6:32pm

MissFortune's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

MissFortune's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancée got out of the shower, completely shaved. I went over to her, wrapped her in a hug and asked her what the occasion was. She pulled away and said that she had a gyno appointment. My fiancée will clean up for the gyno, but not for me. FML

by jimboxo / 04/26/2009 at 3:15pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I found out that the noise I thought was a mouse in my room was a water bottle shaking when my refrigerator turned on. I stayed up till 4am looking for a mouse that didn't exist. FML

by alikat / 04/26/2009 at 11:13am / United States (Maryland) / Animals

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

by DBR / 04/23/2009 at 6:45am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I locked my keys in my car. After spending 20 minutes on the phone with AAA, and then waiting a half hour, the guy showed up, he stuck his hand in the drivers side window and asked, "You couldn't just reach in?" I forgot I left the window open. FML

by .... / 04/17/2009 at 12:49pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML

by mandy / 04/10/2009 at 11:35am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was walking out of a Starbucks and saw someone walking out behind me, thinking it would be the nice thing to do I held the door open. I was holding the door for about 30 seconds before realizing I was holding the door for my own shadow. FML

by Anonymous / 04/06/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML

by emkaycutie / 03/29/2009 at 2:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to iTunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML

by happybirthday / 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got to my underground parking garage at work and saw my boss pulling into a spot. I thought I would show him my reverse parking skills and decided to park beside him. As I was pulling in he opened his door to get out and I smashed into it, nearly running him over. FML

by mikej1985 / 03/20/2009 at 1:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I woke up at three in the morning when two cops busted in the door to my apartment and a frantic voice on my cellphone saying "Sir? Sir? Are you all right? Sir?" Turns out I had been having a nightmare and dreamed I called 911. I actually did. FML

by Miller_Time / 03/18/2009 at 2:45pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a meeting with my super-hot TA. When I got to her office, she complimented me for being early, to which I thoughtfully replied "oh I usually come early." She laughed. FML

by SmoothTalker / 03/16/2009 at 1:40pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I got a $200 ticket mailed to me for drunk driving in Maryland. I have never been pulled over for drunk driving and I have never been to Maryland. FML

by Noname / 03/12/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I got back to my apartment from being away for the past week on Spring break. I found the locks on my apartment changed and all my things on the curb, many of them broken or stolen. I ran to the leasing office to see what had happened. Turns out it was an accounting error on their part. FML

by Homeless / 03/09/2009 at 8:12am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, at a hard rock concert, a bunch of guys accidentally knocked down a port-a-potty while moshing. I was inside that port-a-potty. FML

by shit_upon_literally / 03/07/2009 at 12:51am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, we watched a movie in class. Afterwards, the professor asked us what we thought. I raised my hand and said it was pretentious, dull and a really poor example of filmmaking. It was the movie HE spent five years writing and directing. FML

by Nate / 03/05/2009 at 10:25pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous