MissEmma

Search for a member

Offline (2 hours ago)

MissEmma

99Fucked!

MissEmmaMissEmma
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 4 September 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1883
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About MissEmma : Nerd

MissEmma's page activity

Visits<b>1DisGR8</b> - the 10/29/2016 at 8:06pm<b>Sadat10</b> - the 10/26/2016 at 6:42pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 10/16/2016 at 11:11am<b>roblocke</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 11:58pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 9:53pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 5:04pm<b>tweak2011</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 1:45pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 11:26am<b>dlToTlb</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 4:13am<b>Tenker</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 12:02am<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 11:24pm<b>ReilyStafford</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 6:59pm<b>Gaernem</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 1:00pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 8:15am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 8:15am<b>frostedfoster</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 7:56am<b>ChuckHolmes</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 7:53am<b>Rozza17</b> - the 09/21/2016 at 4:34pm

Fucked!<b>1DisGR8</b> - the 10/30/2016 at 2:06am<b>Tenker</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 6:02am<b>BigDave469</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 6:03am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 9:48pm<b>Mythorius</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 4:56pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 2:17am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 4:23pm<b>jasonrellet</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 7:57am<b>yungblkrich</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 6:00pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 3:58am<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 9:34am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 12:26am<b>stangluv</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 8:43pm<b>nightwings</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 7:51am<b>duduv2</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:50am<b>george_s_4</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 2:57am<b>johny93</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 9:32pm<b>EmperorChowilio</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 6:42pm

MissEmma's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of MissEmma's badges

MissEmma's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to grab a large kitchen knife from my son, after I heard him convince his friend to join him in cutting off his finger, so they could "be assassins like Ezio." FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2015 at 10:29am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was pushing so hard to take a number two that I ended up passing out. FML

by Till We Pass Out / 10/03/2015 at 11:30am / United Kingdom (Calderdale) / Health

Today, I finally finished restoring a car after working on it for 6 months, so I took it out for a drive. On the way back, I stopped at a red light, but the drunk driver behind me didn't. FML

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

by notwhatithought / 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learnt the meaning of the phrase "ménage à trois". I had always thought it was synonymous with "fiasco" and have used it several times in essays. FML

by johobus28 / 08/05/2015 at 11:31pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, on the bus, my blood sugar level got too low and I passed out. When I came to, the woman next to me was hitting me, saying she needed to get off and that she didn't have time for my "stupid fucking prank". FML

by qhorin halflung / 07/22/2015 at 1:35pm / Transportation

Today, I was trying to work out, and couldn't even complete an exercise regime meant for 50-year-olds. I'm 24. FML

by Anonymous / 07/21/2015 at 1:50pm / India (Karnataka) / Health

Today, a week after my miscarriage, my little sister thought it appropriate to wrap her belt around her neck and scream, "Hey look, it's your baby!" FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2015 at 10:38am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Kids

Today, I had to sit through an entire movie where every time a new character was introduced, the guy sitting behind me would say, "My name is Jeff." FML

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. All the magic vanished when I kept queefing every time he thrust into me. We made it about 10 seconds before he broke down into hysterical laughter and lost his boner. FML

by alison / 07/04/2015 at 1:02am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my brother tried cremating our deceased cat. In the oven. My nose has killed itself. FML

by thatguy8878 / 06/26/2015 at 4:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

by shmarf / 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I worked in a shoe store. As I was removing the shoes off an older man I felt a squish, and pulled back my hand to see brown and yellow. The man then looked at me and said, "Looks like I missed a spot." Dog crap. FML

by UkuleleTime / 06/10/2015 at 1:25am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, at work a customer bitched me out for not explicitly telling her that our peanut butter pancakes contain real peanut butter. She's threatening to sue because she's allergic to peanuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 9:07pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend, when a guy pulled a knife and told us to hand over our money. My boyfriend blurted "I don't have shit, dude! She has tons of cash!" The moment the mugger turned to me, my boyfriend ran away at top speed. FML

by kash / 06/01/2015 at 2:14pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous