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MissDarkness

Offline (the 01/24/2015 at 12:26pm) | Search for a member

MissDarkness

8Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11607
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!

MissDarkness's page activity

Visits<b>abattior</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 12:01am<b>Garagedwella</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 1:52am<b>spencer4148</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 9:10am<b>G00N3R</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 3:16pm<b>Jasim</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 2:37pm<b>DeathEater59</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 1:25am<b>shadowedpixie</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 12:14am<b>justingug76</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 12:29am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 11:08am<b>jeremy1993</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:46am<b>mjb1595</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 10:12pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 6:32pm<b>ArtemisGide</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 2:16am<b>baconsdelight701</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 5:10am<b>worldofcool</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 11:52pm<b>itsb_freed</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:55am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:28am<b>starbarbazar</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 2:55pm

Liked!<b>spencer4148</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 3:09pm<b>G00N3R</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:18pm<b>pawelthink</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 6:42am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:37pm<b>Evil20071</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:21am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 2:37am<b>jenkelo</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 8:02pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:55pm

MissDarkness's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of MissDarkness's badges

MissDarkness's favorite FMLs

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

#17338982
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43569) - you deserved it (14537)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

#17315983
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39661) - you deserved it (13249)

On 07/31/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by creepedout - United States

Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML

#17298408
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29865) - you deserved it (4880)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:26pm - misc - by someone - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

#17294808
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38438) - you deserved it (9834)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML

#17292941
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33064) - you deserved it (6655)

On 07/29/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

#17283152
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29989) - you deserved it (15539)

On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37571) - you deserved it (5607)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML

#17215427
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38264) - you deserved it (9755)

On 07/22/2011 at 9:38am - intimacy - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, after spending time with my daughter and painting her nails she gives me a hug and says, "Mommy I love you, but I love daddy much better!" FML

#17190243
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33613) - you deserved it (4157)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:37pm - kids - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

#17187875
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39182) - you deserved it (5369)

On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got a call from a man yelling and cursing at me, calling me a "selfish no-life asshole" for getting his "baby girl" pregnant. I'm 29 and she is 27 and we have been married for 3 years. FML

#17187115
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48023) - you deserved it (2840)

On 07/20/2011 at 3:40am - kids - by Harry - United States

Today, after being in love with one of my best friends for ages, he took me on a date. We then went back to his place and we made love. Afterwards, he told me he wanted to show me something and led me outside. He ran back in and locked the door. It's a two hour walk home. FML

#17174791
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52571) - you deserved it (6709)

On 07/19/2011 at 7:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to meet the girl he has been cheating on me with. He thinks it makes the cheating more understandable if I see how 'hot' she is. FML

#17165263
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60603) - you deserved it (5649)

On 07/18/2011 at 4:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, my mum told me that my sister's little kiddie swing wouldn't hold my weight. I told her she was being stupid, and went on anyway. A broken ankle and two pins in my elbow later, I'm willing to accept this. FML

#16905617
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7728) - you deserved it (53697)

On 06/29/2011 at 2:12am - health - by Anza (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, my daughter told me that my head is shaped like a kidney bean and that I'm lucky she even talks to me in public. She's 6. FML

#16881052
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38361) - you deserved it (5127)

On 06/27/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by MakeMyDay_27 - United States (Pennsylvania)



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