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MissDarkness

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MissDarkness

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1983 (30 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6545
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!

MissDarkness's page activity

Visits<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 12:41am<b>flufee2</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 8:23pm<b>useless_reject</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 8:21pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 10:25am<b>prophetsam</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:22am<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:41am<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:11am<b>unicorn_rainbows</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:18pm<b>hoosierhysteria</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 6:12pm<b>depressed_child</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 12:13am<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 10:55pm<b>WizardlyUnicorn</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 6:14pm<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 11:38pm<b>dextrementor</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:33pm<b>eddyinfinity</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:03am<b>bomberos_08</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 3:23pm<b>TrAG3dY</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 2:35am<b>fmlrulesBolt</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 12:31am

Liked!<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:55pm

MissDarkness's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of MissDarkness's badges

MissDarkness's favorite FMLs

Today, at work I got an urgent message from my boyfriend that there was an emergency and I should come home immediately. I took my last personal day of the month and drove the half-hour home. The emergency? The cat had vomited on the comforter. FML

#17901158
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26040) - you deserved it (3105)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:48am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my 20 year old daughter started ranting to me about her latest boyfriend's erectile problems. Trying to be a good dad, I told her all I knew about how to get the boy fixed. My wife decided to stick her head in and say, "Listen to your dad, hun. He knows all about this kind of thing." FML

#17897207
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31616) - you deserved it (5035)

On 10/03/2011 at 5:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I got mad at my 4 year old son for cussing me out. Afterwards, I went upstairs to get ready for the day. When I came back downstairs I found him pooping on my brand new leather couch. FML

#17880683
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27026) - you deserved it (10580)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:10pm - kids - by kewtness_17 - United States (Texas)

Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing on my stomach. The weight made me shit myself. My new nickname is "Muddbutt". FML

#17880531
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31629) - you deserved it (4170)

On 10/01/2011 at 6:45pm - misc - by FirstStringQB - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML

Today, desperate for my boyfriend to notice me for once, I started noisily masturbating while he was playing World of Warcraft. His response was to put his headphones on. FML

#17811635
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38239) - you deserved it (11330)

On 09/23/2011 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML

#17795601
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44994) - you deserved it (8125)

On 09/21/2011 at 1:20pm - intimacy - by ThisBlows (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

#17789200
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26827) - you deserved it (35590) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/20/2011 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by Prinpette - France

Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML

#17786255
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50714) - you deserved it (6079)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Cantgetno (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17786213
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28676) - you deserved it (4578)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:24am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was fired for being a very happy and perky employee. According to my boss, it freaks both the customers and my co-workers out. FML

#17780072
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24838) - you deserved it (6189)

On 09/19/2011 at 11:56am - work - by Lexiebear27 - United States

Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML

#17761780
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35137) - you deserved it (2305)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:43am - love - by cheated (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

#17761729
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24960) - you deserved it (4128)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized my girlfriend thinks that the goal of sex is to get it over with as quickly as possible. FML

#17756781
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27747) - you deserved it (5424)

On 09/16/2011 at 7:28am - intimacy - by QuickieGirl - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got kicked off the train because I refused to stand for an old lady who wanted to sit down. There was an empty seat right next to me. FML



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