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MissDarkness

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

MissDarkness

6Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7345
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!

MissDarkness's page activity

Visits<b>yesimoverthirty</b> - yesterday at 10:57pm<b>Rajni_dev</b> - yesterday at 1:33pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:22pm<b>travelfreak</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 8:13am<b>sailing_is_life</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 9:33pm<b>HersheySquirts</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 12:38pm<b>pawelthink</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 4:59am<b>jimmy_poison</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 3:11pm<b>Drfucked</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 7:40pm<b>abv96</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 5:58pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 5:28pm<b>wookieewhosshe</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 10:45am<b>rob02</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 10:13am<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 9:16am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 3:43am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 2:59am<b>LovelessAlex</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 12:29am<b>vikky538</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 11:59pm

Liked!<b>pawelthink</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 6:42am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:37pm<b>Evil20071</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:21am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 2:37am<b>jenkelo</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 8:02pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:55pm

MissDarkness's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of MissDarkness's badges

MissDarkness's favorite FMLs

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32621) - you deserved it (4117)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML

#19913255
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25926) - you deserved it (3546)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia

Today, my wife is giving birth to our first born. I am an officer stationed overseas. Apparently, I am not only missing the birth, but I also missed the conception. FML

#19911168
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55269) - you deserved it (2456)

On 07/08/2012 at 8:30pm - love - by moodyreallyrocks - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

#19846265
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26064) - you deserved it (15693)

On 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I laughed when I shouldn't have and am probably fired. What happened? My boss asked me if birds were reptiles. I thought he was kidding. FML

#19817734
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25134) - you deserved it (3120)

On 06/20/2012 at 8:46am - work - by notanidiot - United States (Michigan)

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

#19810073
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42871) - you deserved it (3922)

On 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got to the stage in our relationship where she thinks its okay to change her tampon whilst I brush my teeth. FML

#19786918
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28194) - you deserved it (5472)

On 06/14/2012 at 12:28pm - love - by Sir Vom-a-lot (man) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I went to take my driver's test, and I did almost everything perfectly. The last thing was to back into a driveway. As I went to put my hand on the passenger seat to look over my shoulder, I got so nervous that I hit my instructor in the face. FML

#19782263
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24367) - you deserved it (3049)

On 06/13/2012 at 2:13pm - misc - by sopissed - United States (Maryland)

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

#19776975
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40777) - you deserved it (3868)

On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML

#19774662
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27731) - you deserved it (2021)

On 06/12/2012 at 1:29am - health - by fmmmmlll (woman) - United States

Today, I talked to my father for the first time in several years. I proudly told him that I have been attending Beauty School. He looked me up and down and said, "Doesn't look like you've learned much." FML

#19772636
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22277) - you deserved it (2703)

On 06/11/2012 at 7:39pm - misc - by beautyschool22 (woman) - United States

Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML

#19750023
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30460) - you deserved it (4572)

On 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm - health - by LaurenB (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML

#19749862
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34041) - you deserved it (5804)

On 06/07/2012 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I came out of the closet. I came out on Facebook to spare myself awkward conversations and gossip. I wrote a deeply meaningful status about my partner and my pride in who I was. The only responses were, "Lol", "Hacked", and similar remarks. FML

#19719368
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28267) - you deserved it (11541)

On 06/02/2012 at 2:50am - misc - by OutOfTheCloset - United States (Texas)



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