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Mini96

Offline (the 10/20/2014 at 10:28pm) | Search for a member

Mini96

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 19 January 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1361
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Mini96's page activity

Visits<b>schwaka</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 1:53am<b>waitwhatsgoingon</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:32am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 7:56pm<b>tifdunc</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 11:32am<b>jerzjay</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 10:21am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 10:32am<b>notmepleade</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 10:27pm<b>GeneralStew</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 7:32pm<b>n_rosie</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 8:44am<b>CaptainSmith28</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:59pm<b>saocrates</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:08am<b>Bigfabthetruth52</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 2:49pm<b>thelittlemissy</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 11:14am<b>watdoisay</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 1:37am<b>juan3611</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 3:21pm<b>miztigers53</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 7:17pm<b>lovebug177</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 6:30am<b>flynryder</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 7:46pm

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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Mini96's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave birth to my first child. The first thing my husband says? "When can I hit it again, doc?" FML

#21280942
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32180) - you deserved it (4099)

On 10/19/2014 at 7:22am - kids - by how about never? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33185) - you deserved it (3395)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34377) - you deserved it (3712)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to my grandma's yard sale, only to find my baby pictures being sold for 25 cents each. FML

#21275511
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38577) - you deserved it (2977)

On 10/11/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by Forge (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35920) - you deserved it (4867)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30933) - you deserved it (14258)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was flipping out because I couldn't find my wallet, and after several hours of cussing myself out, I went downstairs to make breakfast. I poured cereal into my bowl and my wallet flopped out with the Honey Nut Cheerios. I need to stop drinking. FML

#21267969
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22582) - you deserved it (33270)

On 09/29/2014 at 10:13pm - misc - by KasSmoke - United States (Texas)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45393) - you deserved it (3477)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35632) - you deserved it (3641)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

#21258820
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33712) - you deserved it (3513)

On 09/15/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I had an important oral report to deliver with a partner. Not only did he come in late and high, he pronounced Virginia as "Vagina" the whole way through. FML

#21257414
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35867) - you deserved it (3143)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:36am - misc - by Jamestown of Vagina (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for jokingly telling her to get back in the kitchen. After we finally made peace and I told her that I fully respect women, I turned on my stereo. The song's first words? "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." Cue second argument. FML

#21252547
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34471) - you deserved it (16195)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

#21251846
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41237) - you deserved it (8236)

On 09/04/2014 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by candy man - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42871) - you deserved it (7391)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39947) - you deserved it (7260)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



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