Milcah

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Milcah

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1380
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Milcah's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:22pm

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Milcah's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at Wal-Mart and I asked a guy who worked there where the scrapbooking stuff was. He led me to the aisle where it was and then said, "By the way, I don't work here." FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2010 at 10:58pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2010 at 1:30pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I spent over $160 and 2 hours preparing for a Halloween party I was throwing. The only person who showed up was my sister, who helped me decorate. FML

by halloweenless / 11/01/2010 at 9:14am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad, who lives hours away, called and told me he was getting married. Today. As in this evening. Guess I'm not invited. FML

by Googlebug / 11/01/2010 at 6:15am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

by Nemesis2747 / 12/24/2009 at 1:09am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML

by shandrith / 07/03/2009 at 10:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

by fmlfmlfml / 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

by Dunzo15 / 05/02/2009 at 2:28am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML

by gentileman / 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love