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Midnite_2raw's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 03/10/2012 at 9:20am / United States (New Mexico) / Love
Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML
by awhmaaan / 02/27/2012 at 10:55am / United Kingdom / Health
by Anonymous / 12/18/2011 at 5:09am / Australia / Intimacy
by bluestarr1 / 09/10/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 06/14/2011 at 10:38pm / United States / Love
Today, I was bored. Some people would've called up friends to hang out. Not me. I had the sudden urge to make an entire Excel Spreadsheet on how much I've spent on iTunes, month-by-month. I'm not sure what's worse, that I got really into it, or that I've spent nearly $800.00 on iTunes. FML
by Mik / 06/07/2011 at 11:05pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook and changed our relationship status to single just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML
by fmfb / 06/07/2011 at 7:09pm / United States / Love
Today, I announced to my family that I will be trying out for the next season of America's Best Dance Crew. They responded by laughing hysterically and my mother said "You guys suck, good luck making it past auditions". FML
by sherronj / 06/06/2011 at 11:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 06/05/2011 at 11:29pm / United States / Transportation
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- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…
- Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me that he listened to me yesterday: I said that I loved unusual… Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s…