MidnightTrue

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MidnightTrue

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 January 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7238
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MidnightTrue : I'm nice, and I love reading, writing, and music. Currently, I'm in college and taking basic classes right now. Eventually, I hope to graduate with either a Nursing or Radiography degree. I like meeting people and making new friends, so just send me a message if you'd like :) And I might add some people on Facebook too lol

MidnightTrue's page activity

Visits<b>NObeeS</b> - the 10/04/2011 at 11:23pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:40pm<b>coryadam23</b> - the 02/18/2011 at 9:31am

MidnightTrue's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MidnightTrue's badges

MidnightTrue's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

by mary / 02/21/2012 at 10:33am / Australia / Health

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

by 97 / 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

by JukeboxValkyrie / 02/16/2012 at 2:52am / United States (Florida) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

by jess / 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to take a dump out of a second-story window is a very bad idea. FML

by michael / 02/13/2012 at 9:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I sneezed after watching a commercial involving dust. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2012 at 7:04am / United States / Health

Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML

by pmony / 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

by Rachal / 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2012 at 11:33am / United Kingdom (Armagh) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

by maruskasommers / 01/09/2012 at 4:39am / Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

by Danny / 01/07/2012 at 5:27am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I found my missing shoe. It hit me as it fell out the tree in our front yard. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2012 at 11:18pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while watching Rio, I got a boner when Blu and Jewel kissed. This is almost as pathetic as getting a boner a few days ago while watching Homer and Marge kiss on The Simpsons. I think I'm way past the point of ever getting laid. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2012 at 1:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was having 'goodbye' sex with my boyfriend. Now for the next four months he's going to remember our last time as the one where I farted and couldn't stop laughing. FML

by atleese / 12/31/2011 at 10:37am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

by blegh / 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy