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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 18 September 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2312
  • Number of comments : 150
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 25 posted

About MidnightMusic53 : I'm just here for the laughs.

MidnightMusic53's page activity

Visits<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 1:53am<b>AmericanBadAss</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 2:11am<b>lost7702</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 12:28pm<b>interesting33</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 5:47pm<b>Goats_in_floats</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 3:00pm<b>psmith78332</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 7:50am<b>batman169</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 12:21pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:31pm<b>mptb9997</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 11:08pm<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 11:11am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 2:44pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 4:41pm<b>Serire</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:14pm<b>Beyto7000</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 2:43am<b>andy594328</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:37am<b>xDochx</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 7:56pm<b>tymarie2012</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 5:53am<b>NotR3ddy</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 9:38am

Fucked!<b>interesting33</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 11:47pm<b>psmith78332</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 1:50pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 3:31am<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 5:20pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:44pm

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MidnightMusic53's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that you should always check the litter box before vacuuming stray litter outside of it after my cat burst out from the box mid-piss and skittered around the house still pissing after I put the vacuum hose behind the box. FML

by mallyboo / 10/01/2016 at 10:38am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, while commuting to work on a peak hour train, I lost my balance and accidentally grabbed a bald mans head to steady myself. To make matters worse, the words "oh gosh, I'm so sorry. I thought you were a knob" came out of my mouth before I could think about what I was saying. FML

by ShameMonkey / 09/27/2016 at 6:15am / Australia (Victoria) / Transportation

Today, I was having dinner at my aunt's house who just migrated to Germany from India and doesn't know any German. I asked for the recipe of a dish and she said that she has been buying these cans with cute kitty picture and just adds spices to it. Catfood is delicious I must admit. FML

by drchinky888 / 09/18/2016 at 1:10pm / Spain (Catalonia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally mooed during sex. FML

by harambae / 09/11/2016 at 1:10pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML

by Loud / 09/08/2016 at 2:07am / Australia / Work

Today, I was checking my kitten's neutering stitches when he farted so hard that a stray piece of cat shit shot out and hit me in the eye. FML

by BodyElectric / 07/26/2016 at 1:06am / Animals

Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML

by DumbassRoaster / 07/10/2016 at 3:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I did a California stop during a drive with my Driver's Ed teacher. He made me get out, hug the stop sign and apologize to it. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2016 at 9:13pm / Transportation

Today, I woke up to my husband chuckling. When I asked him what was so funny. He told me that during the night I attempted to shove one of the kids' pacifiers in his mouth. I don't remember this, at all. He thinks it's hysterical. I'm not sure what to think. FML

by Binkplugged / 07/05/2016 at 2:01pm / Miscellaneous

Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML

by Dramaqueenfornothing / 04/27/2016 at 6:32pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Love

Today, I got mugged. Trying to be brave, I attacked my mugger, who then broke my nose. Suddenly, I was saved by someone: A 15 year-old goth girl who promptly tackled the mugger to the ground. I'm a 21 year old man. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2016 at 1:32pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I overheard a coworker talking about going to what sounded like a dentist's appointment. As she left later, I jokingly said "Remember to open wide!" Turned out her appointment was with her OB/GYN, not a dentist. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2016 at 11:44am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, while working my job as a swim instructor, my coworker sprayed me with the hose. I instinctively held up what I was holding to block the cold water. I was holding a 4 year-old. FML

by humanshield / 04/10/2016 at 12:49pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my dog was so happy to see me that he laid down on his back and started pissing like a fountain. He pissed on everything around him, including me. FML

by Koko / 04/07/2016 at 12:07pm / Germany (Berlin) / Animals

Today, I discovered my cat is bathroom shy when I accidentally walked in on him relieving himself. He jumped about 3 feet in the air and bolted out, launching feces and pee all over the bathroom, hallway, and my shoes. FML

by poop / 03/24/2016 at 2:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals