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Melodija

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Melodija

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 June 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1280
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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Melodija's page activity

Visits<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 6:12pm<b>Ltturner234</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 10:51am<b>kimberthekat</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 8:53pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 4:57pm<b>hilamonster06</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:49am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:23pm<b>KevenV</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:32am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:22am<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:11pm<b>N605</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:07pm<b>SilverFalchion</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 8:36pm<b>rachelekolb</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 9:59pm<b>samsam901</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 5:26pm<b>AdrianF9</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 10:49am<b>julaylay99</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 8:48pm<b>MrCareless</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 1:47am<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 5:52am<b>The_9th_Doctor</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 1:18pm

Melodija's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Melodija's badges

Melodija's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my brother telling his friend that having sex with a girl who's on the pill gives the guy female hormones and "turns you into like, half-chick, half-dude." He was serious. How am I related to this moron? FML

#21270200
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32710) - you deserved it (2423)

On 10/03/2014 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked a passenger what he wanted to drink. When he said marijuana, I started making pot jokes. He really asked for mineral water. I was given a drug test when we landed. FML

#21269829
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29628) - you deserved it (10215)

On 10/02/2014 at 9:55pm - work - by stewardess - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39560) - you deserved it (3571)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend convinced my 4-year-old sister that girls don't poop. She won't stop crying and now thinks she's a freak. FML

#21260556
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36504) - you deserved it (3462)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:16am - kids - by Anonymous - Kenya

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, I woke up to the sight of a dead fly on my bedside table, being eaten by a swarm of ants. I screamed so bad that my dad said he thought my sister was being murdered in my room. FML

#21248448
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32315) - you deserved it (5739)

On 08/30/2014 at 12:40pm - misc - by liilii (man) - India (Kerala)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40835) - you deserved it (9481)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my parents accused me of being secretive. I have no idea what they're talking about; all I do is work, go to school, sleep, and eat. Now I'm grounded until I tell them what's going on. I have crazy parents, that's what's going on. FML

#21242846
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42326) - you deserved it (2716)

On 08/22/2014 at 12:09am - misc - by up to no-good... - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

#21240474
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31192) - you deserved it (13732)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm - misc - by FANZZY - United States (New York)

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

#21231691
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26343) - you deserved it (37959)

On 08/07/2014 at 11:36am - health - by Dancing King (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, since I work at a doughnut shop, I came home smelling like fry oil and had bits of sugar on me. My boyfriend told me he loves having sex with me right after I get off work. He said its like having sex with a hot doughnut. FML

#21230044
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45206) - you deserved it (6943)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by donutsex (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49120) - you deserved it (21236)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML

#21222062
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53020) - you deserved it (6396)

On 07/27/2014 at 1:12pm - love - by fingwhore (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML



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