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Melodija

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Melodija

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 June 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1566
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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Melodija's page activity

Visits<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 6:12pm<b>Ltturner234</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 10:51am<b>kimberthekat</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 8:53pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 4:57pm<b>hilamonster06</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:49am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:23pm<b>KevenV</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:32am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:22am<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:11pm<b>N605</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:07pm<b>SilverFalchion</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 8:36pm<b>rachelekolb</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 9:59pm<b>samsam901</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 5:26pm<b>AdrianF9</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 10:49am<b>julaylay99</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 8:48pm<b>MrCareless</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 1:47am<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 5:52am<b>The_9th_Doctor</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 1:18pm

Melodija's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Melodija's badges

Melodija's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML

#21293677
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29350) - you deserved it (13250)

On 11/06/2014 at 8:55pm - animals - by dwood08 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML

#21293369
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34200) - you deserved it (7548)

On 11/06/2014 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

#21292789
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28707) - you deserved it (3311)

On 11/05/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by aineroo (woman) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I looked at my twelve-year-old daughter's test. One of the question was, "When is a good time to worry about your parents?" Her answer was, "When they take selfies, because selfies aren't made for old people." FML

#21292082
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29830) - you deserved it (5571)

On 11/04/2014 at 4:48pm - kids - by The Selfie Parent - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

#21288518
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25804) - you deserved it (21068)

On 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

#21285040
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32518) - you deserved it (5329)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, while reading 1984 on the train, a cute guy around my age and I got into a great a discussion about the book. Just when I thought he might ask for my number, he got up, patted me on the head and said it's so nice that kids my age still took interest in real literature. I'm 25. FML

#21284324
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35473) - you deserved it (2702)

On 10/24/2014 at 9:47am - misc - by anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML

#21283230
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30798) - you deserved it (4090)

On 10/22/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by CJune24 (woman) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I overheard my brother telling his friend that having sex with a girl who's on the pill gives the guy female hormones and "turns you into like, half-chick, half-dude." He was serious. How am I related to this moron? FML

#21270200
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33121) - you deserved it (2439)

On 10/03/2014 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked a passenger what he wanted to drink. When he said marijuana, I started making pot jokes. He really asked for mineral water. I was given a drug test when we landed. FML

#21269829
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29840) - you deserved it (10280)

On 10/02/2014 at 9:55pm - work - by stewardess - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39701) - you deserved it (3575)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend convinced my 4-year-old sister that girls don't poop. She won't stop crying and now thinks she's a freak. FML

#21260556
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36615) - you deserved it (3467)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:16am - kids - by Anonymous - Kenya

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, I woke up to the sight of a dead fly on my bedside table, being eaten by a swarm of ants. I screamed so bad that my dad said he thought my sister was being murdered in my room. FML

#21248448
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32351) - you deserved it (5742)

On 08/30/2014 at 12:40pm - misc - by liilii (man) - India (Kerala)



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