Melix

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Melix

13Fucked!

Melix
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 September 1999 (16 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3805
  • Number of comments : 148
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About Melix : Raggedy man, goodnight.

Kidneys! I have new kidneys! I don't like the color.

Melix's page activity

Visits<b>machone</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 1:29am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 4:50pm<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 8:52am<b>jesusofsuburbiax</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 3:02am<b>jayyvonhatesyou</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 7:34pm<b>lukey12</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 5:45pm<b>jojocircus19</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 12:03am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 4:41pm<b>EmikoShiriyuki</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:28pm<b>jill97</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 2:39pm<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 11:26am<b>weedle99</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 12:08pm<b>anormalperson</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 5:21am<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 7:56am<b>sa5v</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 6:24pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 10:54pm<b>CthulhuSyd</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 5:14pm<b>matthewyear32</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 2:45pm

Fucked!<b>jojocircus19</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 6:04am<b>I_Like_Dogs</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 2:00am<b>CthulhuSyd</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 11:13pm<b>Pop_And_Lock</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 8:09pm<b>Candace7</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 7:42pm<b>aguynamednick</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 3:57am<b>kittyninja19</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:43pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 8:55pm<b>JustBeingMe99</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 4:27pm<b>supetwholockian</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 11:38pm<b>claudia19801811</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 7:47pm<b>mollypop35</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:48pm<b>yaybutter</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 5:18am

Melix's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Melix's badges

Melix's favorite FMLs

Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML

by Angry and Confused / 06/29/2013 at 5:55am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I held a party for my family so I could announce my pregnancy. In the middle of my speech, my mother stopped me, saying, "Nobody gives a rat's ass, where's the booze?" FML

Today, I took my girlfriend of nearly 2 years out to dinner so I could propose. When the waiter brought the check, I caused a bit of a scene to get everyone's attention. When I got on my knee and proposed, she said no and asked if I could hurry up and pay, because she was embarrassed. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2013 at 4:26pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with a seemingly really awesome guy. It went quite well, until dessert came and he started telling me why bestiality "isn't really so wrong, you know?" Riiiggghhttt. Looks like I'm still single. FML

by kittyfiddlernono / 06/23/2013 at 3:39pm / Bulgaria (Pernik) / Love

Today, I was playing a video game that required me to hunt a few animals. My mom walked in, saw what I was doing, then went into her psycho vegan mode and started yelling at me. She basically grounded me for "murdering" pixels on a screen. FML

by welp, time to become an assassin / 06/23/2013 at 2:14pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife made me moist cat food burgers as a prank. I didnt have the heart to tell her that they tasted better than the ones she usually makes. FML

by kittybad / 06/23/2013 at 1:05am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 2:39am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML

by breeeeeh / 06/21/2013 at 6:18pm / Love

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh / 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 10:28am / United States / Animals

Today, I donated blood for the first time. I'm completely healthy and after waiting the appropriate amount of time I left, feeling fine. That is until I went out to eat with my family an hour later and passed out in front of the whole restaurant. FML

by hi_there4397 / 06/14/2013 at 12:39am / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, my boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet my parents but I made him do it anyway. One of the first things out of his mouth was, "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock, he added, "You know, when you made your daughter! She's awesome!" FML

by lsababy / 06/11/2013 at 2:46pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as I was walking home, I saw an ambulance pull into my driveway with its sirens blaring. Thinking it could be for my sick father, I started frantically sprinting. I managed to trip on my pant-leg, twisting my ankle in the process. They were just turning around in my driveway. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2013 at 12:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I spent my last day at the hospital for a long epilepsy test. Apparently, I don't have epilepsy at all, but I do have extreme stress. This means that I've been taking several anti-seizure medications that ruined my college plans and made me sick for half a year, all for nothing. FML

by HollyJollyXmas / 06/09/2013 at 11:40am / United States / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.