About Megan_xox : Probably sleeping
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Megan_xox's favorite FMLs
by PrettySureItsReal / 04/09/2015 at 3:38pm / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML
by S to the HIT / 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, after pulling an all-nighter studying for an exam, I caught the bus to college. On the way there, the bus decided to make sweet love to a taxi, creating a pile-up and a traffic jam. I didn't make it to the exam in time. FML
by rUs7up1d / 04/08/2015 at 10:43am / Guatemala (Guatemala) / Transportation
by _1CrazyEyes1_ / 04/07/2015 at 7:57pm / Virgin Islands, U.S. / Love
by Anonymous / 04/07/2015 at 5:00pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
Today, after over six weeks of not getting a single shift at my part time job, I finally went in to meet my new manager. He didn't even know I existed. Apparently my old manager lied and said I quit so they hired someone else. FML
by nattlecakes / 04/07/2015 at 3:23am / United States (California) / Work
Today, I was wearing a new tank top that was really cute. I later was talking to an attractive guy and thought he was giggling at me because he thought I was being cute and funny. I then realized he was giggling at the fact that I only shaved one armpit. FML
by rayraydayday / 03/21/2015 at 12:25am / United States (Colorado) / Love
Today, I was helping out during the school play's interval. My head of year jokingly asked me to follow him around with these mini cocktail sausages for the rest of the school year. I thought it would be witty to reply, "Does that make me your official sausage holder?" FML
by MirandaJones / 03/20/2015 at 10:41am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love
by shawnsmuffins / 03/19/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my upstairs neighbors filed a noise complaint against me for banging on the ceiling every night. They conveniently left out the part where they constantly stomp, shout, and do stuff that sounds like they're dropping bricks to the floor every night. FML
by Anonymous / 03/19/2015 at 11:56am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/19/2015 at 1:01am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML
by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids
by brokeforever / 03/18/2015 at 6:23pm / Latvia (Riga) / Animals
Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms. I couldn't find them anywhere, so I nervously asked a staff member for help. She scowled, pointed at the shelf directly behind me, and told me to "Get a life. Or better pickup lines." I'll never live down the snickers from the other customers. FML
by fuck / 03/18/2015 at 1:40pm / Netherlands / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 2Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…