About MeLuvBewbs : If you are reading this, please leave. I'm pregnant and busy filling up my shot glasses. I have to go to Karma later and Jersey turnpike the shit outta my cuca. Jersey shore bitches!
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MeLuvBewbs's favorite FMLs
Today, I dropped my handbag into a water-filled gutter. As I was hurriedly fishing out the contents of my bag, I looked up. There was my ex, with the girl he left me for walking past, timed exactly to coincide with me manically scooping up one of many rapidly absorbing tampons. FML
by shamefaced / 12/06/2012 at 10:11pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Love
Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML
by Matt8 / 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was yelled at by a customer, who was upset over having waited twenty minutes for a waiter to come take her order. Maybe it would be understandable, if she was sitting in an actual restaurant, and not a serve-yourself coffee house. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2012 at 6:50pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
by bieberslayer / 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm / United States / Geek
Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML
by mom / 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was bartending. A guest was getting belligerent so I had to cut him off. He called me a bitch and threw the rest of his drink in my face before storming off. The belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend. FML
by FMyEx / 12/06/2012 at 6:50am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
by whaleninjapoop / 12/06/2012 at 3:24am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by psd60 / 12/06/2012 at 2:18am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, as my friend was rudely rummaging through my phone, she saw a picture of the pottery I've painted her for Christmas. Not only did she see it, but she also declared it ugly. That's probably the present I'm the most proud of this Christmas. FML
by a / 12/06/2012 at 1:15am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by SpanishInFrenchClass / 12/06/2012 at 12:35am / United States / Work
Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML
by Anonymous / 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm / United States / Kids
Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML
by lonelyandcold / 12/05/2012 at 6:27pm / United Kingdom (Solihull) / Money
by JessThompson / 12/05/2012 at 11:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML
by Anonymous / 12/05/2012 at 6:27am / Israel / Kids
by leannez / 12/05/2012 at 12:35am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
- Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, because I’m on my period, I asked my boyfriend to turn around so I could change my clothes.… Today, returning home, I found my roommate trying one of my bras. When he saw my shocked face, the…