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McBoogerballz's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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McBoogerballz's favorite FMLs
Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML
by HappilyNeverAfter / 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by soontobesingle / 03/19/2013 at 7:30am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML
by jealouspussy / 02/20/2013 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML
by no sleep for me / 01/08/2013 at 2:44am / Miscellaneous
Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML
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- Today, I was sitting on my 70 year old grandmothers bed with my older brother. I decided to snoop… Today, I saw my ex-girlfriend across the street. I was walking with a girl whom I'd been hooking up… Today, I found the engagement ring I'd bought and been missing for a week. On my girlfriend's hand.…