Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Matty_No9

Search for a member

Matty_No9

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 21 March 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 960
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Matty_No9 : FML cracks me up

message me if you must, ill respond to ya

also, if it seems as though i view your profile something short of a billion times it is more than likely due to boredom or i had forgotten your name/picture and remembered it as soon as i visited your profile again lol ;)

Matty_No9's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 2:08am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 5:24pm<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 5:35am<b>tangonaf</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 1:53am<b>queentexan</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 1:12am<b>aus_r34p3r</b> - the 04/24/2012 at 1:30am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:38pm<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 01/16/2011 at 7:42am<b>Robert27</b> - the 07/24/2010 at 7:40pm<b>smileyseven</b> - the 03/27/2010 at 6:20am<b>aardvarkish</b> - the 03/27/2010 at 6:11am<b>drainyou123</b> - the 02/20/2010 at 11:19pm<b>DayumitsAllie</b> - the 01/13/2010 at 8:41pm<b>dancexoxtwilight</b> - the 01/02/2010 at 6:29pm<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 12/26/2009 at 12:02pm<b>BaBiiSpAnKy821</b> - the 12/19/2009 at 12:48am<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 12/16/2009 at 11:43pm<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 12/10/2009 at 4:50pm

Matty_No9's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Matty_No9's favorite FMLs

Today, as I got into an elevator, I spotted a little old lady hobbling desperately to get on. I frantically tapped on the 'door open' button but the doors closed. I got dirty looks from the people in the lift, only then did I realise I had frantically tapped the 'door close' button instead. FML

#4805621
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22706) - you deserved it (29963)

On 08/25/2009 at 5:17am - misc - by ElevatorThug (man) - Singapore

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

#4070299
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52130) - you deserved it (14223)

On 07/27/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by fmysexlife (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my dad somehow found some pictures of my boyfriend having sex with some girl and went on a rampage about how pissed he was that he was cheating on me. I had to explain to my parents that I was the girl in the pictures. FML

#4062613
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44484) - you deserved it (17487)

On 07/26/2009 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by omgwtfsam (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I caught my little brother peeping at my friend getting dressed in the bathroom. When I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm just doing what Ray does to you while you're in the bathroom." Ray is my new step dad. FML

#3563535
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (124555) - you deserved it (4584)

On 07/07/2009 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by Nicole (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

#2925389
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80712) - you deserved it (5542)

On 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm - misc - by Shaun (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

#1751488
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76811) - you deserved it (23410)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: