Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Matt_192

Search for a member

Matt_192
  • Town/Country : Your Mom's, Bed
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 June 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 9124
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Matt_192 : My names Matt... I'm a Chemical Engineering major at Texas Southern University. I like to draw, do photography, write music, play the trombone and piano, and occasionally try (and fail at) poetry. I enjoy long walks on the beach, taking in the sights and sounds of the dirty water in Galveston, and making small children cry with my horrible singing. Also, I'm a chemistry nerd and I love to learn new things. Oh, and I'm awesome :P

P.S. Conformity is for losers. Be yourself.

Matt_192's last visitors

alexmac222killerpenguin4EllaJSwiftieRawrImaDragonmoldypeachesSonfangNoxialisI_iz_B_a_troll

Matt_192's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of Matt_192's badges

Matt_192's favorite FMLs

Today, wanting to change from the usual pizza/coca cola menu, I decide to cook. After spending 1h30 making a "beef chili with ancho, mole, and cumin" I sprinkle a bit of salt on top of it. The top came off the salt. I think it's back to pizzas for me. FML

#1229
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13392) - you deserved it (2139)

On 01/15/2009 at 11:00am - health - by j0j0 - France (Aquitaine)

Today, a drunk girl asked me for directions to her hotel. I had just bought an empanada and was feeling good, so I agree to look up the address on my phone. Two minutes and a text charge later, I got the address. Out of inebriated glee, she hugged me and knocked the tasty empanada out of my hand. FML

#1108
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14608) - you deserved it (3457)

On 01/14/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Hungry - United States (Virginia)

Today, my portfolio manager called me and said he had invested all of my retirement in Circuit City. FML

#1021
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29270) - you deserved it (2370)

On 01/13/2009 at 5:06am - money - by Noname - United States (Virginia)

Today, I enjoy reading this site and other people's suffering just to feel better about my own life. FML

#818
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22252) - you deserved it (6341)

On 01/08/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by sampaloompy - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boss called me in to tell me I had got a raise. I bought a $1500 Chanel bag. Two hours later he called me in to tell me he was kidding. FML

#792
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11377) - you deserved it (26700)

On 01/07/2009 at 4:54pm - money - by Perdedor - United States (New York)

Today, I fell in love with a girl who used to love me. She doesn't anymore. FML

#777
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16892) - you deserved it (14390)

On 01/07/2009 at 12:00pm - love - by Faxshadow - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, my mother was vacuuming my room and found a towel under my bed. She asked "why does it smell so bad?" I replied "sweat". FML

#672
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11862) - you deserved it (31191)

On 01/01/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. I look him straight in the eye and ask him: "What's the first thing you think about when you look at me?". His answer: "Can I finish my steak?" FML

#656
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14899) - you deserved it (6186)

On 01/01/2009 at 7:09am - love - by Undefined - Sent from mobile version

Today, I argued with a boy from school over a girl. I didn't know he was a black belt judoka. I'm still in pain. FML

#492
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15125) - you deserved it (6115)

On 12/11/2008 at 5:40am - misc - by Pfff - Sent from mobile version

Today, a girl in my class turned around and said, "Wow, you've got your photo on a rubber! That's amazing!" The rubber was designed to look like a £10 note, and the picture was of the Queen of England. FML

#491
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15338) - you deserved it (1727)

On 12/11/2008 at 12:13am - misc - by Elizabeth - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm heading towards my car clutching a bunch of flowers for my girlfriend, when along comes a sweet old lady who says: "it's not flowers she wants, it's some lovin'!". The elderly sure aren't what they used to be. FML

#449
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19401) - you deserved it (2734)

On 12/04/2008 at 6:16am - misc - by DarkPhoenix - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was making love with my girlfriend and my landline rang. Obviously, I let it go to voicemail. At the very moment I was about to cum, I heard my mum's voice on my voicemail: "Hi sweetheart!" FML

#337
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38516) - you deserved it (3747)

On 11/18/2008 at 11:58pm - intimacy - by Gwayhir - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out my "best friends" have gone on a crazy weekend and they didn't invite me. FML

#240
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31262) - you deserved it (3896)

On 11/07/2008 at 2:14am - misc - by z - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

#8
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (266631) - you deserved it (23311)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi -



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: