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Matt_192

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Matt_192

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 June 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12809
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Matt_192 : My names Matt... I'm a Chemical Engineering major at Texas Southern University. I like to draw, do photography, write music, play the trombone and piano, and occasionally try (and fail at) poetry. I enjoy long walks on the beach, taking in the sights and sounds of the dirty water in Galveston, and making small children cry with my horrible singing. Also, I'm a chemistry nerd and I love to learn new things. Oh, and I'm awesome :P

P.S. Conformity is for losers. Be yourself.

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Matt_192's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends staged an intervention. I'm not on drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, and I own my own house. My car is paid for and my job pays well. Apparently, I need an intervention because my life is not where they want it to be, which involves me being married with children. FML

#17004757
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35573) - you deserved it (3133)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, on my metro ride home, I sat next to a woman who thought it was appropriate to continually scratch at her scalp and then eat her 'scalp pickings'. When I looked over at her hair, I could see scabs clumped together from her previous scratching sessions. FML

Today, I gave a girl answers to a test. She said she would give me something pleasurable in return. She gave me a Twinkie, saying, "I know how much fat people love twinkies." FML

#16207509
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25579) - you deserved it (35076)

On 05/16/2011 at 3:34pm - misc - by pyroman1127 - United States (Utah)

Today, I saw a car swerving in front of me on the freeway, so I whipped out my cell to report the DUI. As soon as it started ringing, I see police lights in my rear view and got slapped with a ticket for using a cell phone while driving. After explaining why, the officer said, "Nice try." FML

#16028485
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25532) - you deserved it (25628)

On 05/03/2011 at 1:22am - misc - by AE86Turbo (man) - United States (California)

Today, a very attractive girl moved in across the road from me. As I was leaving, I noticed she was looking out her window at me. I tried playing it cool, only to end up tripping over my own feet, hands in pocket, and faceplanting the hood of my dad's car. FML

#15890797
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27202) - you deserved it (18298)

On 04/22/2011 at 9:39pm - kids - by NathanPlays - United States (California)

Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML

#15846302
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29043) - you deserved it (4087)

On 04/19/2011 at 11:37am - misc - by oops (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML

#15546142
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33107) - you deserved it (4959)

On 03/29/2011 at 1:12pm - misc - by uggo - United States

Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML

#15538339
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33410) - you deserved it (4813)

On 03/28/2011 at 10:22pm - misc - by -_- - United States (Florida)

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

#15528931
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28007) - you deserved it (54341) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

#15514877
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42066) - you deserved it (28674)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by rowie1311 (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I co-starred in a production of Hamlet. Halfway through play, the actor playing Hamlet forgot his lines, threw a raging temper tantrum, screaming about how much he hated the play and how he wanted to go home in front of hundreds of audience members. FML

#15497521
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32155) - you deserved it (3220)

On 03/26/2011 at 11:41am - misc - by Sue (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I quit my job after I overheard my boss doing a 'hysterical' impression of me telling her about my dad's heart condition. FML

#15495668
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42261) - you deserved it (3279)

On 03/26/2011 at 8:05am - work - by dinomite -

Today, to make my dorm neighbours think I'm popular, I blasted music and screamed at the top of my lungs so it sounded like I was having a party. My residence manager slapped me with a noise violation, and demanded to come in to make sure we weren't drinking. I had to explain why I was by myself. FML

#15486650
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8455) - you deserved it (53065)

On 03/25/2011 at 7:05pm - misc - by freshman - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML

#15441546
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11475) - you deserved it (42429)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by PFCdavila (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having I shot at him with the sniper gun I bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was ok. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML

#15431141
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12970) - you deserved it (47493)

On 03/22/2011 at 12:31pm - misc - by FailedSniper (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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